“What does he sell?”
Vanessa said, “Oh, I thought you’d recognize the name. ‘Wilson’s Electronics’.”
“Oh, now I do recognize the name, but there’s not one here in Forrestburg.”
Vanessa snorted. “Too many farmers. And the students who can afford a computer or a stereo or TV usually already have them and bring them from home. No, Aaron concentrates on the larger cities, like New Orleans, Mobile, Memphis and others, but he likes living in Beauchamp. He really loves his boat. When he’s not opening stores, we’re on the water.”
I nodded as I stood. “I see. Well, you’ll soon be telling me a lot more and I’m anxious to hear it.”
I managed to watch her put her sexy shoes on her dainty feet without her noticing. I walked her to the door. “This was a very good session. If we keep at it like this, I’m sure you’ll feel better soon.”
She said, “Thanks Sue,” and left.
As soon as I heard her close the outer door, I started dialing. There were three women and two men with whom I could have casual sex and listening to Vanessa had me worked up to the point where I needed relief. I tried my favorite first and got lucky. Linda was glad I called and invited me over right away. It was a very good night, for both of us. Afterwards, as I lay there in Linda’s arms, I wondered if Vanessa had done the same thing.
Session 04
Bill nodded. “Very interesting. No wonder she’s worried about losing him. Aaron Wilson isn’t one of the richest men in America, yet, but he’s certainly on his way. From her description he seems like an outstanding catch for any woman. It’ll be interesting to learn how she came to be with him.”
I said, “Yes, I agree. But if he is such an ‘outstanding catch,’ why is she seeking outside action?”
Bill burst out laughing. “Oh my God! ‘Outside action?’ What the hell have you been reading? Or watching? Or with whom have you been talking? That’s hilarious jargon coming from you.”
I laughed, too. “But apt, don’t you think?”
Having gotten control of himself, he sucked in a lot of air. “Yes, quite apt. Damn, you’re getting me caught up in her story. It’s like watching a sexy movie or some late night European television show. Not to make light of your patient’s condition, of course.”
I nodded. “Yes, every once in a while, a patient comes along that’s so interesting even we psychiatrists have to pull the sticks out of our asses and just relax and be human.” I sighed. “I have high hopes for her. I think it may be time to put her on a mood stabilizer.”
Bill agreed. “Long past time for that. I’d have had her on one after she all but pulled you down onto the couch and had her way with you.”
I flashed him a wicked smile. “Do you think you would have succumbed to her charms?”
He gave me a blank stare for a few moments. “Maybe not hers, but there are some I could name that I wouldn’t have been able to resist.”
I lowered my eyes. Bill was such a good friend and I felt so relaxed in his presence that I often forgot he still felt a lot of sexual tension towards me. “Bill, I can only say ‘I’m sorry’ so many times. I simply could not have given you what you needed from me. Is being my therapist too hard on you?”
He gave me that famous grin of his, the one I call ‘fuck the devil and all who sail with him.’ “Was mich nicht umbringt, macht mich stärker.”
I countered. “‘Was aus Liebe getan wird, geschieht immer jenseits von Gut und Böse.’ I like to read Nietzsche, too. You’re one of my treasures, Bill. I’m sorry I can’t be one of your loves.”
His eyes softened and he rose from his chair. “I’ll see you next week.”
***
Vanessa arrived at our appointment dressed casually and smiling sweetly. “Hello, Sue.”
I motioned toward the couch. “Good to see you. Are you ready to continue?”
She nodded and headed for the couch. I stationed myself facing her instead of my usual place, partly because she did a lot of sitting up and turning when she spoke to me, and partly because I wanted to monitor her reactions and behavior more closely.
When she was settled, I began. “Please continue telling me about your relationship with Karen.”
“What do you want to know?”
“Whatever was meaningful to you? Your impressions, your expectations, your joys, your sorrows, your disappointments. When did the relationship end? What caused it to end? How did you feel about that?” I shrugged. “Just talk to me.”
The pretty All American Girl smiled and held her gaze steady on mine. For the time-being, at least, she suppressed the sexpot and I could rely on her to tell the truth.
“Well, I knew that Karen had a job but she never talked about it much.”
“Then how did you know she had one?”
Vanessa shrugged. “She always had money, more than me anyway, and she either didn’t have parents or they didn’t get along. She never called anybody and she always stayed on campus for the weekend.”
“Maybe she was a ‘trust fund’ kid?”
Vanessa shook her head. “Dressed in t-shirts and blue jeans? Nah, no way. She was pretty enough, mind you, but she didn’t have the clothes, the makeup, the car, the friends. No sign of having come from wealth. And she didn’t seem to have THAT much money, just more than if she worked part-time checking groceries or some such.”
“Did you ever ask her?”
Vanessa nodded. “I’m getting to that,” and flashed me a mischievous grin, “if you’ll let me.”
My God, even when she wasn’t trying she radiated sex appeal. Whether dressed in a tight skirt, garter belt, and high heels or khaki shorts and flats, whether pouting with those full and luscious lips or flashing those dazzling white teeth, whether her warm tawny eyes smoldered with lust or twinkled with amusement, she apparently couldn’t help but be sexy, sexy, sexy. And it wasn’t just her perfect breasts or her long shapely legs or her mouthwatering derriere or her natural blonde hair or the sensuous way she moved or all of them combined. Something in her nature, her carnal need coupled to her sense of fun, both operating simultaneously and on a subliminal level and therefore part of her very being and therefore TRUE, no matter if her words were false at any particular moment.
All these thoughts sped through my mind in an instant, but I held firmly to my purpose. I wouldn’t succumb to her charms, overwhelming though they may be. I couldn’t. Christ, could Bill be right? Was I in love with her? Did I have obsessive thoughts about her? Frequently? Were my pulse and respiration elevated? Were my panties damp with arousal? Did I masturbate while fantasizing about her? Yes. God help me, but the answer to all these questions was “Yes.”
I told myself, “But you are strong-willed. You’ve shown that your entire life. You’ve made sacrifices before and you can make them now. It’s required that you do so. You have to flush your feelings with the ice water of professionalism. You can’t even use the excuse that it’s for Vanessa’s good because that only feeds into your obsessive ideations. You don’t have to save her because you can’t. No psychiatrist can save a patient. More so than any other field of medicine, you can only help a patient save herself. And doing that requires strict neutrality. Get a grip Sue. Your future is at stake.”