Morgan sighed, her normal expression returning. “I thought about inviting Joel over, you know. Give you a taste of your own medicine. You clearly wanted me to see, why shouldn’t I want the same for you?” She paused. “If you’re feeling scared imagining if that happened, then try to imagine how I’m feeling.”
“He would have blamed Quinn though,” Taylor pointed out.
Morgan lazily turned to face me, then turned back. She sighed again. “I hate that you’re right,” she mumbled. “What will it take for you to stop acting like you get to control everything?”
“So this is just something she does?” I couldn’t help asking. “Or, at least, something she’s done once? So you’re not mad at me?”
“I thought I asked you to let me speak,” Morgan rebutted me calmly. “I am mad at you. Of course I’m mad at you. But you never had the idea to do this…” She looked back at Taylor again as she finished her thought. “…just the lack of willpower.”
I shivered as Taylor turned to face me. “I told you, Quinn. Every guy cheats.”
I felt my blood boil. “You’re the one that caused this!” I blew up. “You cornered me into this! I wanted to stop this and even told you that!!”
Morgan intervened. “I reserve the right to be mad at you for not stopping it. If you don’t think that’s fair, I don’t know what to tell you. Are you also angry that Taylor isn’t taking responsibility for her actions? How about you set the standard and take responsibility for your own?”
Jesus fuck, Morgan could be terrifying without even raising her voice when she wanted to be. She was still looking at me without saying anything, so I felt compelled to speak. “If I had… if we were boyfriend and girlfriend, like, officially, then I would have held my ground more,” I defended myself. “Taylor explained to me the distinction between just dating and in a relationship, and only now I’m realizing she may have just been telling me what she wanted me to believe…”
Morgan looked at Taylor in confusion. “The difference between…?” she repeated.
“Way to, like, throw me under the bus, Quinn,” Taylor mumbled at me angrily. “I was just telling him about my own experiences, and like… my…”
“Outlook.”
“Outlook, yeah. That part is not my fault.”
I cleared my throat, wanting to keep Morgan’s attention while I still had it. “I have learned from this, and I don’t want anything to come between us. I think I really do want to be your boyfriend, Morgan. I’ll make the offer now, if you’ll have me.”
Morgan’s look of confusion intensified as she turned to me. “Quinn, read the room,” she scolded me. “Now is probably the worst time to make me that offer. It will take me a lot longer to make my own decision about that, especially now.”
I hung my head, chastised, as Morgan turned back to Taylor. “I just don’t get it,” she began softly towards her. “You hate it, more than anything, when your heart is broken. You don’t shut up about how all men just break your heart and sleep around with every girl they can find. So why the hell are you trying so damn hard to be the other woman?”
That broke some kind of barrier for Taylor. With the way she spat even the first word, I could tell she was furious. “Me?! You’re the other woman here, not me! I knew Quinn first, and we had that connection first, and I bet you couldn’t handle that! You always have to have what I have, even after I finally get the one guy that gives me what no other guy could!”
I was feeling confident about that last part until Morgan gave the game away. “Submission and loyalty? Really? Coming from the girl that has a boyfriend?!” Her face unhinged as she talked. Finally, anger spread throughout her face, and it was even scarier than I thought. I could only shrink down into the corner I had backed myself into, as the catfight continued.
…And continued, and continued… shows, movies and books did a good job of making these kinds of fights look more short and concise, and less pointless and… repetitive. Over time I was realizing two things. A, they had gotten to the point where they had recycled the same talking points to each other three frigging times, and B, it was getting late. I really did not want to have to be the one to intervene and be assertive, but some sixth sense in me was telling me that when teenage girls got like this, they’d do it for hours until they burnt themselves out, and I didn’t have the patience for that.
As if I had any right, I got up and marched into the middle of the room, physically separating the two, still mid-yell.
“This is stupid and has gone on for way too long,” I yelled to both of them. “You’re getting nothing done yelling at each other, so find a place to sit down and listen to what I have to say for a bit.” Taylor opened her mouth to protest so I quickly added, “Don’t argue, just do it!”
That seems to have done it. I felt good, like I was Ben Manibag when I said that or something, though realistically speaking I probably looked more like Napoleon Dynamite. Morgan didn’t argue, sitting on the floor (albeit with her trademark blank-yet-displeased expression) and Taylor sat in her beanbag chair, her sourness evident on her face.
I began talking, not really having a plan in mind but feeling confidence flowing in my veins. “This situation is a lot like math in two important ways,” I began. “One, the solution will be made clear if we ask the right questions, and two, if Taylor doesn’t pay attention, she’s doomed to just repeat the last year over again.” I pointed to Morgan. “So, first question. Do you want to break up with me and never date me again?”
Morgan was taken aback by the question, though clearly equally not amused by it. “This isn’t the time to ask me.”
“Yes it is,” I asserted.
“Well then I can only answer that I don’t know,” she concluded defiantly.
I shook my head. “Not good enough. But, tell you what, Taylor and I will be silent and allow you the space to think until you do have an answer.” I maintained eye contact with Taylor as silence filled the room. It was a really good sign that Morgan was still willing to listen to me, and to my ideas.
Finally, Morgan spoke. “I think, given the circumstances and knowing Taylor, I’m willing to give you another chance.”
I nodded, weirdly not even caring about her answer as much as where I wanted this to go, and turned to Taylor. “Can you understand why Morgan was hurt?”
“Yes, but-”
‘Yes’ was all I needed. “What were you trying to accomplish here, with me?”
Morgan cut in. “She was trying to break us up. That was her main goal, that’s what she was gunning for, and that’s a big reason why I’m giving you another chance.”
Spite. Awesome. That’s a reassuring reason to stick by someone. Taylor interjected, finally giving her reply. “I was trying to, like, show to Morgan how this kind of thing can, like, really fucking hurt,” she said plainly. “Like, yeah, she was hurting, but I was hurting too, and it’s like she wasn’t even aware of it, or didn’t even care, until I hurt her back.”
“Taylor, that’s not fair,” Morgan argued. “You two were, correct me if I’m wrong, just friends with benefits. No offense, if even that. You two weren’t in a relationship. A relationship wasn’t even on the table for you two.”