*******
In the living room, we sat on the sofa and drank vodka and orange juice. She had a heavy hand with the vodka, and we were into the third refills. They went down smoothly, and I underestimated the impact they were going to have on me.
She must have underestimated the effect too. She was doing one of her favorite bits, which was making up lewd song parodies. She was singing an absolutely filthy mash-up of Carole King’s “I Feel the Earth Move.”
I said, “First of all, you haven’t got the rhyming done correctly. And the whole thing you’re doing is just way over the top.”
“But that’s what the song is really about if you think about it, I mean sexual desire.”
“Nora, it’s about more than that. When was that anyway — June 1971? — and it was on every ten minutes.”
“Yeah, I got sick of hearing it.”
I was just drunk enough to get nosy. “So with this Burger King job, are you quitting your other profession?”
I thought she was going to tell me to mind my own business, but she was lit up enough herself to answer me. “Yeah, I think it’s time to stop that for the moment.”
“Why, are you ashamed of it?”
I think she was ashamed, but she wouldn’t admit it, “No, I just have enough money for the moment.”
She had already told me an amusing story of how she had stashed her cash, most of it in small bills, into her chest of drawers upstairs. Her uncle had found it, but he didn’t seize it. Instead, he had made her open checking and savings accounts.
She threw it back at me, “So, do you have any money squirreled away?”
I replied, “Yes, I have an account that my grandfather set up for me.” He owned a small fruit wholesaling business.
“Great, he did all of the work and you get the benefits. How much is it?”
“As you said — enough. I can see that the maintenance spanking didn’t work.”
“You’re surprised? Hey, I’m a tough, streetwise, bad-ass girl.” I knew that was mostly not true because, at vulnerable moments — like that first night at The Salient office — she had admitted it to me. Then, “A mere belt isn’t going to faze me.”
“I admit, I felt a bit guilty about hitting you with it.”
She went into a mincing kind of voice, “Oh my, I’ve been such a shameless strumpet, slash harlot, slash hussy. I deserve a little spanky every now and then.”
I figured I’d tell her what I wanted. “I think I should give you more maintenance than you’ve been getting.”
Now she had a sort of Katharine Hepburn tone, “That is a completely splendid idea.”
Something else caught my attention. “Those old jeans of yours, I really like them for some reason.”
“You like pulling them down so you can, ah, correct me.” She rubbed her behind again. “Man, you really walloped me.” That sort of contradicted what she had just told me. “You think maybe you could go back to using your hand? That seemed to be more than adequate.”
I was amused by how she how phrased it. “Sure, baby, I can do that.”
Then, out of nowhere, it seemed, I blurted out, “Nora, I love you.” The vodka had helped bring that out.
She laughed. Oh God, she’s mocking me. Then she said, “The reason I laughed is because, in a relationship, whoever pulls the trigger on that first loses the game.”
“What game? What’s wrong with it?”
She leaned towards me, “There’s nothing wrong with it. You see, Paul, I love you too.”
I looked closely at her to determine if she was bullshitting me. But I was getting to know her pretty well, and I could see that she was completely sincere.
*******
I just had to bust Nora’s chops by going to her Burger King one day. I had something to do in Manhattan and after that, I went out to Maspeth. I maneuvered myself so that she had to take my order.
“May I help the following guest?” She was already glaring at me.
“Yeah, I’d like a Whopper, medium-rare…”
“We don’t cook them to order here. They only come one way.”
“But that slogan, have it your way?”
I knew she wasn’t happy with me being there. “Then just go to a diner. Would you just give me your order already?”
I asked for a Whopper, small fries, and a diet soda. As she counted my change, I said, “I just love that hat.” It was a shapeless brown blob.
I knew she hated it. “It’s one of the worst things about being here.”
“And that uniform. Who would have thought brown and yellow went so well together?”
She refused to answer me. I went on, “Are the pants tight in the back? Do they show your ass well?”
She looked around, and then she went to the back counter. For a brief moment, she stuck out her behind. When she came back she said, “There, are you happy now?”
“It looks really good, nice and trim.”
“My uncle twice took the pants down when I got home and gave me a maintenance spanking, as you both put it. He even took down the thong I had on underneath.”
“Wow, that’s really hot. A bad fast-food girl getting spanked in her uniform.”
“I knew you’d think that. I admit it was pretty hot.”
“Are you wearing a thong now?”
“I’m not going to tell you that. But I do keep this stupid hat on when he takes me over his knees.”
“God, Nora, I’m getting a boner just thinking of that.”
“About this hat?” She shook her head and smirked at me. “Well, go outside and jerk off somewhere.”