— April 1996 —
During a lunchtime conversation, Joe gave Tina some news. It was kind of a big deal, but he downplayed it.
“Rolling Stone wants to do an interview. My career is over, so It seems pointless.”
“No, it’s not. You have songs on the radio. You just ended a world tour. You’re still a thing, Joe.”
“Not really.”
“You read Rolling Stone. I can’t believe you’d pass on that. Who’s the reporter?”
“Mila Carrera.”
“You love her! She’s a great writer. You turned me on to her work. Now I’m really shocked you declined. She’s your favorite.”
“Yeah. On the list of most influential people she’s interviewed, I wouldn’t make the top fifty.”
“That’s not true, Joe. You should do it. I bet it would be fun.”
“Nah. I like my quiet retirement from the limelight.” Joe hesitated. “Remember when I told you there was a third woman from New York with an offer on the table?”
“Yes, but it was business.” Tina’s lightbulb lit up. “Oh, I get it. You gave Mila Carrera your rewards member offer?”
“Not quite. She has a lunch offer and I seriously doubted she’d be willing to fly cross country for a retired minor league schlub like me.”
“Don’t sell yourself short, Joe. You’re definitely a major league schlub.”
“Thanks, T.”
“You should do that interview, Joe. I would love to read her writing about you. Mila is a great writer. She makes everything personal. She covers careers, but what she really goes for is life away from the stage.”
“Sadly for me, I have no life worth reading about.”
“When did she ask for this interview?”
“Oh, the first request was last summer, before the Epilogue Tour. Marty wanted to create buzz over the new album and world tour, so he arranged a lunch for me to meet with Rolling Stone. I declined and left Marty to pass on my regrets.”
“I don’t get it, you love Rolling Stone, and especially her.”
“At the time, Marty had mentioned a different reporter. The thing is, I’m not interested in doing long-form interviews. You know why, T. It’s not a secret.”
“I know. You’ve been burned.”
“Yeah. I got screwed with The Young Punks and again with the angels. It seems every time I sit down with a music reporter they use my words out of context or they twist them entirely to suit their agenda. Fuck them. I haven’t done a long interview in four years.”
“When did Mila’s name come up?”
“They called again right before the Madison Square Garden show. They said Mila wanted to meet me backstage before the show and have a talk. You might recall I had a lot going on that night. I passed. A few weeks after the show she called me personally and asked if I would reconsider.”
“If she called you herself, she’s serious.”
“She says she’s a fan and she was at that last show. I told her my career is over. I’m no longer relevant. I just want to ride off quietly into the sunset.”
“What did she say about that?”
“Mila said I should let Rolling Stone decide if I’m still relevant and deserving of pages in their magazine.”
“She’s good.”
“She said she’d like to reflect on my career. It’s hard to believe it’s over. I’m in my prime and so few artists walk away in their mid-thirties when they’re on top. Mila feels it’s a good story. I find it boring.”
“She’s really good… because it’s not boring. That’s a great angle. What did you say to that?”
“First of all, I’m not on top. I’ve never been on top. City of Angels was a middling success. Not everyone wants to run around the world, or on stage, into their golden years.”
“And she said?”
“We went back and forth for a while. Mila kept pressing and I played defense. That’s when I made the offer. I told her I have no reason to go to New York but if she flies to LA I will meet her for lunch. I would like to meet Mila, but that was just my way of getting out of that conversation.”
“Hey, if you’re not doing the interview, why did you bring it up?”
“Because she called again, two days ago, and I’m thinking about it.”
“Really? You should do it, Joe. If your career is over it can’t hurt your career. And you know she’ll be kind to you if she’s a fan.”
“I haven’t decided.”
— Siren —
Tina had been frustrated by Joe’s refusal to go someplace they’d been to many times before, phone sex. After the Martini call she was feeling hopeful, She was using her intimate memories of them to push him closer. T adored talking about intimacy and sex. She did this with her closest girlfriends, but Joe was the only man she could go that far with. Her husband was too self-conscious. He got embarrassed. Tina loved that Joe embraced the awkward. Any discomfort and squirming were fun to him, but at this stage of their relationship, it was hard to get him there.
Joe was alone in LA. She knew he was without a lover and figured he needed this as much as she did, but he was hanging on to those platonic rules, even over the phone. In her horny mind, that was just stupid.
She suspected he hadn’t been with a woman since Jenna, back in November. He claimed there was no one in LA. Unless he was keeping a secret fuck buddy, Joe was four months celibate. Tina was certain she could break him down. She needed to find a way to penetrate his armor.
“Can I tell you about my day dream today?”
“Is this another siren song?”
“What do you mean?”
“Odysseus, Greek mythology.”
“What about him? I assume it’s a man.”
“You don’t know the story of Odysseus?”
“No. Should I?”
“Which one of us went to college?”
“Shut up.”
“The sirens were temptresses living on an island. They sang to passing ships. Any sailor who heard the siren’s song would try to reach the island, only to perish on the rocks. You’ve never heard this?”
“Nope.”
“Odysseus commanded his men to lash him to the mast so he couldn’t follow the sirens. Then he had each man fill their ears was beeswax so they couldn’t hear the song. The siren song drove him mad and he ordered his men to cut him loose, but they couldn’t hear him. He’s the only man alive to hear the siren song and live to tell.”
Tina didn’t give a shit. “Okay, good to know.”
“Do you know the Steely Dan song Home At Last?” Joe sang the lyrics. “The danger on the rocks has surely passed. Still I remain tied to the mast. Could it be that I have found my home at last, home at last.”
“Yes, Joe. I know that song, but what the fuck does this have to do with us?”
“You’re a siren trying to tempt me with your song of sex talk. If I listen I’ll perish on the rocks.”
“Well then, make like Odysseus and buckle up. I’m going to tell you what I was remembering today.”
“What are you doing, T, taking daily strolls down memory lane? It seems every call has some blast from the past that involves fucking.”
“Yes, I’m enjoying my memories of us and I thought you might too.”
“I do.”
“And this one is not about fucking. Today it started when Jen and I were talking about the first time we sucked cock.”
“Oh, it’s about sucking, a plot twist. I was not there for that T, but I’ll listen to your memory of some other dude if that’s your wish.”
“Be patient. I’ll get to our memory in a minute. I’ll never forget the first time I put a cock between my lips and felt my boyfriend twitch inside my mouth. It wasn’t just his cock, it was his whole body. Then I got that salty taste on my tongue. I liked it. I loved the feeling of my mouth full of him, and I started sucking lightly. I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing but when I felt him growing in my mouth, I figured I was doing okay. When he was fully hard I took him as deep as I could. And there, with that cock poking at my throat, I had a transcendental experience.”