Valentine’s Day Cupcakes – the Whole Story
Back in February 2022 I submitted an entry for the 750 word project. Many readers asked me to expand it beyond that short entry. Reading the original is not necessary for this story, but for the curious you can find it here: https://literotica.com/s/valentines-day-cupcakes
The characters in this story are flawed, just like you and me. Sometimes they make bad decisions as they struggle to live their lives. Sometimes they make life changing decisions, not always positive. All characters and situations are complete fiction, a product of my fertile imagination. Any similarity to actual people and situations is purely a coincidence. All constructive criticism is welcome.
*****
It was a blustery morning in March. My desk phone rang. The caller ID said it was Joe, my boss.
“Eric, can you come down here. We have a new employee for your group that you need to meet and get onboarded.”
“Sure. Be right down.”
As I headed for the stairs, a bunch of thoughts ran through my head. It would have been really nice to be included in the hiring process. Do we really need another person? Well I guess that we do. There’s a lot of work to be done. Why does everything need to be so secretive?
I work in the quality control section of our manufacturing company. There are seven of us, well now eight. We cover all quality aspects of our operation – from incoming part inspection to assembly line audits. I work in the field failure investigation area. Essentially, when shit starts breaking after it leaves our factory, I’m the guy who has to figure out why. Now that I thought about it, it did make sense to bring in a new person. I just wish Joe had allowed me some input.
When I got to Joe’s office, a petite redhead stood to meet me. She was professionally dressed and very pretty. I was at least a head taller than she was.
Joe remained seated, “Eric, this Erin Reynolds.” I shook her hand as Joe continued, “She’ll be working with you in field failures. I have a rough plan that it will take you about three months to bring her up to speed. She’ll have two evaluations before we formalize her hire, one at three months and one at six. Any questions?”
I was pissed, but I didn’t want to let it show, “How long have we known we were bringing Erin onboard?”
“I just found out this morning. Arlene in H.R. recruited her from the university’s graduate school.”
“Oh.” I turned to Erin, “Well, welcome to the team. Let’s get you settled in.”
We returned to my work area in silence. I wouldn’t call it an office. It is more like a lab. I didn’t know what to say, but I remembered that a closed mouth gathers no feet.
As we walked in she said, “Sounds like I’ve been dumped on you, that you don’t need me.”
I motioned Erin to a chair, “It’s okay. You are certainly needed. It’s just a little weird having a new co-worker thrust on you. So tell me about yourself.”
She thought for a moment, “Well, I’m 31 years old. Been married about a year. Just graduated with a master’s in applied statistical analysis. My bachelor’s is in mechanical engineering. Spent four years working for one of our competitors. We moved here for my husband’s job. Simon is some kind of big wig in his company.”
So Erin was ten years younger than I was. I later found out that she had held a pretty important position at one of our competitors. I also found out that her husband was a high powered financial guru, a CFO in fact.
I didn’t have much to say, “Well, it sounds like Arlene made a good decision to recruit you. How much do you know about our company?”
She had really done her research. She knew we’d been in business for ten years and we had experienced double digit growth for the past six. She had a very thorough knowledge of our product line. Our benefits were excellent, we received stock options regularly, and our company’s stock price was going through the roof. We all hoped to be a lot wealthier in a few years.
For the rest of the morning we rearranged the lab so that Erin had a place to work. I ordered her a desk and a laptop, set her up with our IT people, and began showing her our operation. She caught on very quickly.
When we broke for lunch, I took her to our dining facility. Lunch is free for all employees, we just need to scan our badge. Up until this time, I had always eaten with a couple of the old-timers. For some reason, I didn’t feel like subjecting Erin to their crude ‘locker room’ banter so we grabbed a table across the room from them.
As we began to eat I was struck for the first time by her beautiful green eyes. They were mesmerizing. I found myself holding eye contact with her much longer than I normally would. I also noticed the lovely freckles that adorned her cheeks.
Now that we were out of the professional space of the lab, Erin’s vibrant personality took over. She shared with me her joy of hiking and biking in the outdoors, of traveling, of learning new things. It was one of the most enjoyable lunch hours I had spent in a very long time. I was going to like having her around.
That evening I told my wife, Helen, about my new co-worker. I didn’t tell her how pretty Erin was or about our ‘eye flirting’ as I came to think of it.
Helen was less than receptive to the idea of me having a female colleague, “Why did they have to hire a woman?”
I was shocked, “Are you kidding me? Aren’t you the woman that sits here and rails against the misogynistic climate in the corporate world? Aren’t you always arguing that women need to be given equal opportunity and equal pay?”
“But this is different!”
“How is it different?”
“Because she working with you!”
“So I can only work with men? You’re the one being a misogynist. In fact, you’re being ridiculous.”
*****
Of course Helen knew I would be attracted to a woman like Erin, but I would never act on that attraction. It helped that Erin always dressed modestly. She never wore tight jeans or a shirt that would allow me to fantasize about her body. She was a brilliant, beautiful woman with a cheerful personality. It was nice having her around.
Over the course of the next month I was able to introduce Erin to nearly all aspects of our responsibilities. I found out that she was an expert in using analytical software. She could quickly identify trends before they became a major issue. For example, she identified a possible electrical issue with one of our products based on an increase in the number of replacement inline fuses we were shipping to our customers. The two of us dug into it and with the help of one of our repair technicians quickly found the source. Suddenly, rather being reactive we had become proactive. We initiated an engineering modification to be installed on every repair, thus saving the company a potential $3 million over the course of the next two years. I made sure Joe knew that Erin was responsible for it. He moved up her evaluation date and soon she was a permanent hire.
It was funny to watch the increase in the number of fellow employees who suddenly had business with us. Repair technicians would bring the smallest issue, not to my attention, but to Erin’s. Design engineers would stop by and run an idea by her. She thought all the attention was quite funny. In general, all the guys were very nice. She was also popular with our lesbians. On one occasion, one of the senior engineers started coming on too strong. She asked for my help and gave me a look. I took over and ran interference for her.
We got into the habit of eating lunch together every day. During the course of those lunch hours we slowly became good friends. I learned about her past and that she hoped to start a family soon. She shared pictures of the new house that they had purchased. It was a cute ‘arts and crafts’ house with huge potential for a family. She also got my opinion on some of the ideas she had for remodeling the kitchen.
*****
I wanted to invite Erin and Simon to our house for dinner, but Helen held me off. Finally, after Erin had been working there for about three months, my wife agreed. It was late June and the weather was perfect.
We cooked some steaks on the grill and had a nice dinner on our patio. I noticed that Erin didn’t have any alcohol. I knew she preferred IPAs, but she didn’t take one when I offered it. Simon on the other hand was not bashful. At a conservative estimate, he drank an entire bottle of merlot himself. Helen matched him glass for glass. By the end of the evening Erin and I were still sober and our spouses were smashed.
When they finally left for the evening, Helen said, “I hope she’s feeling better soon. It typically doesn’t last more than a month or two.”
“What?”
“Silly man! Erin is pregnant. Didn’t you notice how often she went to the restroom? She’s got morning sickness, or in her case – all day sickness. She barely touched her dinner and she only had water.
“Wow! I would have never guessed.”
*****
I never let on that I knew Erin’s secret, but I did notice how frequently she excused herself at work. After a couple of weeks I noticed that her appetite had returned and she no longer sprinted for the ladies’ room.
About a month after our dinner Erin called in sick two days in a row. When she finally did show up, she was not her vivacious self. I knew something was wrong. She said that she hated her job. That the stress was too much.
When we went to lunch Erin remained unusually quiet. I tried to hold up my end of the conversation by talking about a project I had started at home. I just received nods and grunts.
As we were walking back to the lab it dawned on me, “Erin, please don’t think I am trying to pry into your life, but did you lose your baby?”
She turned to me and the tears started gushing. I held out my arms and she planted herself into my chest right in the middle of the hallway. I hugged her tight while she blubbered into my shirt. Sobs wracked her body and I just held on. I’m over a foot taller than she is and I kissed the top of her head. I stroked her hair.
Finally, she eased off, “How did you know?”
“Helen told me you were pregnant. I just put two and two together that something happened. If you want someone to talk to I’m sure Helen would love to talk to you about it.”
Erin gave me a wan smile, “Helen doesn’t like me very much. I think it is very thoughtful that you noticed.”
“The company has the EAP counselors that you can call. When my father died I used the service. They’re very good.”
“Maybe I’ll do that. Simon hasn’t been very sympathetic.”
She hugged me again, pressing the side of her head against my chest, “You’re a good friend. Thanks.”
*****
When I got home that night I let Helen know.
Rather than being understanding she became quite nasty, “Oh! And I suppose you had to comfort her!”
“What’s that supposed to mean? Yes, when I figured it out and I asked her if she lost the baby, she gave me a hug and I hugged her back.”
The sarcasm was flowing, “Oh! And she cried in your arms! Oh how loving! Oh how romantic!
“What’s the matter with you? Don’t you feel badly for her?”
“Yes, I feel bad for her, but she shouldn’t be hugging my husband!”
“It was completely innocent!”
“OH, and I imagine you stroked her hair and kissed her head. You held that hot little body of hers tight against you. Feeling her boobs press into you.”
“I can’t believe you! Where is your humanity?”
“I don’t have any humanity for hot young tarts trying to steal my husband!”
“She not a tart and she’s not trying to steal me. She’s happily married.”
“Yeah. I don’t believe it for a minute.”
*****
About a month later we both got called down to Joe’s office. A client in Dallas was experiencing an exceptionally high failure rate. Joe’s boss wanted the two of us to fly down and figure it out. Since a high dollar future sale was riding on their happiness, this became our number one priority. Our company travel agency already had a flight booked for the next morning.
When I got home I let Helen know what was going on and she went through the roof, “What kind of company sends men and women out together on a business trip?”
“Every company on Earth. That’s a pretty common practice.”
“Well I think it’s wrong!”
“So a company has to hire both men and women, but they can’t send them on a business trip together? Is this something out of Puritan days?
“It’s wrong!”
“I think that companies can assume their adult employees are responsible adults and can act responsibly.”
She stormed off and wouldn’t speak to me.
*****
The business trip lasted five days including the weekend and ended up being very successful. We solved the problem and made some long-lasting improvements to our products.
The Tuesday we got back Joe asked me to come down and see him, “Eric, I wanted to let you know that everyone is very happy with the work you and Erin did in Dallas.”
“Thanks boss. I’ll let her know.”
“But that’s not why I wanted to talk to you.”
Oh shit!
Joe continued, “The night before you left I got a phone call from Helen. She told me that it was outrageous that I was sending a man and a woman out together on a business trip.”
I think my jaw dropped about this time.
Joe chuckled, “I asked her how I should go about solving our problem and she said I should only send same sex teams out. I told her that wasn’t an option for our company. I told her that if I couldn’t send you out with Erin and trust that you would be responsible adults that I would have to fire you. She got all flustered and said that I should fire Erin. I asked her why and she hemmed and hawed for a minute or so. Then she said to forget that she called and hung up.”
I was flabbergasted. I didn’t know what to say.
Joe said, “Just so you know, I’m not going to get rid of you or Erin. You’re a great team. You’ve saved us tens of millions of dollars in what five? Six months?”
I nodded.
Joe stood up and walked over to the window, “Eric, I just wanted you to have a heads up on what Helen was doing. What you do with it is your business. Oh, I’m putting both of you in for a promotion.”
“Thanks boss. I appreciate it.”
When I got back to the lab I told Erin how much we were appreciated and about the promotions, but I didn’t share the other news. I needed to wrap my head around that one.
*****
It was a few days before Christmas and the doorbell rang. I opened it and there was Erin.
Helen called out, “Who is it?”
“Erin!” I turned to her, “Come in! Come in! It’s too cold.”
Helen came into the living room and in one of her more hypocritical moves gave Erin a big hug, “Oh! It’s so good to see you!”
Erin was beaming, “I won’t stay long. I have two things. First, this is for the two of you. You have been so kind and welcoming. I can’t thank you enough.” She handed Helen a package.
Helen gave her another hug, “That’s so thoughtful! What’s the second thing?”
Erin hesitated a moment, “I’m pregnant again! Oh, I hope it works out this time.”
Helen gave her another hug, “I’m so excited for you! I know you will be fine. When are you due?”
“Mid-August.”
I thought I was going to barf at Helen’s phoniness. I gave Erin a side hug as to not incur the wrath of my wife, “Make sure you let us know how we can help you.”
“You two are the best. I gotta run. I have to run over to the mall for one last gift for Simon.”
Erin hurried out the door.
I turned to Helen, “That’s nice for her.”
She mocked me, “That’s nice for her.”
“I’m really surprised you don’t feel like a complete hypocrite. When she’s here you’re oh so nice, but the moment she’s gone out come the knives. When did you become so two-faced?”
“Oh, fuck off!” She threw the gift on the couch and stormed off.
*****
Over the next six months my marriage became more and more fraught. Helen still put up her front though. In June we threw a baby shower for Erin. Simon didn’t come. Helen was all rainbows and unicorns around the expectant mother, but as soon as Erin was gone, nastiness was the order of the day.
As we were cleaning up afterwards, Helen said, “I hope you know I did this for you.”
“For me? I would have hoped you did it for Erin.”
“Nope.”
*****
It was the end of July. Erin was large with child. She was downright miserable and I tried to do everything to make things easier for her in the lab. I probably became a little overprotective, but after the miscarriage, I didn’t want anything to go wrong.
As she was getting up to go for lunch she said, “Ut oh.”
“What?”
“My water just broke.”
She sat back down and called her doctor. The doctor said to head right over to the hospital. She texted Simon to let him know what was going on.
I asked, “How are you getting there?”
“I thought I’d drive myself.”
I shook my head, “No. I’ll drive you.”
I let Joe know what was going on and we headed for the door. Her preferred hospital was about twenty minutes away and I think I got there in fifteen minutes. I told her I’d stick around in the waiting room until Simon got there. Well, Simon didn’t get there until five o’clock. I thought that was really odd behavior.
I went home and let Helen know what was going on. About nine that night I received a text from Simon saying that their son Jacob was born at 8:31 PM. He weighed 6 pounds, 9 ounces. Mother and baby were doing well.
Three days later Erin brought her little bundle of joy over so we could see him. This time Helen was genuinely pleased to see Erin. She cooed over the baby. I thought I detected a little bit of jealousy that Erin had a child, but we didn’t. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t catch hell from Helen.
*****
We were invited to the baby’s christening. Most of Erin and Simon’s extended family came, some having to fly in for the occasion. It was a wonderful, late summer day. After the church ceremony, we gathered back at their home for an all day party.
Helen got drunk and increasingly more belligerent. She made snide comments first to me, and then to anyone around her. After one nasty comment I said we needed to leave.
Helen sneered at me, “I’m not leaving with you.” She grasped at her crotch, “Gotta pee.”
She stumbled off to the bathroom. I resolved to get her home as soon as she came out. The problem was she didn’t show. It took me about ten minutes to realize something wasn’t right. I went up to the bathroom and the door was locked.
I knocked, “Helen are you okay?”
Nothing.
I knocked again with no answer. I went and found Erin and she located an emergency key to open the door. I was expecting a mess, but when we got it open – no Helen.
“Shit!” I ran outside looking for her and she was nowhere in sight. I ran up the road in both directions, but Helen was nowhere to be found.
I went back to the party and I recruited about a dozen guests to help me look for her. Some started driving around. Others searched a nearby wooded area. After two hours of searching someone suggested that perhaps she purposely evaded me. Maybe she took a taxi home.
When I got home, there was a note:
Dear shithead,
I’m out of here. I don’t want anything to do with you or your shitty life ever again. Now you can go fuck your cute little redhead as much as you want. I’ll have a lawyer contact you. Don’t bother looking for me. I don’t want anything to do with your slimy ass ever again.
Go fuck yourself,
Helen
I wasn’t surprised, but still the same I was. Later I found out that Helen ran off with one of her co-workers, a skinny biker wannabe named Chet. He was all tats and leather. He rode a Harley that was just too big for him to manage. Once I saw him pull up alongside our car in the grocery store parking lot. He was trying to be too cool by half. When the bike came to a stop next to us he couldn’t keep it upright and the thing went crashing to the ground. He had his ankle trapped beneath it and I had to lift it off him. When I found out she left me for Chet, I thought that they deserved each other.
Then I started having doubts about myself. If Helen left me for an absolute loser like Chet, what did she think of me? A couple of weeks later I voiced my self-doubts to Erin and she told me I wasn’t a loser. Helen was an idiot. Any woman would be very lucky to have me as a partner. Still, Erin joined me in my mourning. One Friday after work I was feeling exceptionally down and hit the bar. Drinking by yourself is never a good idea. By eight I had had several too many and the bartender made me find a ride home. I called Erin and she came and picked me up.
I don’t remember a lot of what happened, but Erin got me into my house safe and sound. She humored me and sat with me as I poured my heart out to her. I don’t remember any of it. She told me how I expressed my hurt and anger at Helen. She also told me how I professed my undying love for her and she thought I was funny.
*****
When Jacob had his first birthday, Erin and Simon threw a party. I gave the baby about ten books that I thought a little boy might enjoy. It was a nice gathering of family and friends. About half way through I saw Simon leave.
As the party wrapped up I was helping Erin clean up, “Where did Simon go off to?”
Erin was silent and kept her back to me as she cleaned up. I wasn’t sure what was going on so I held my tongue. Erin turned to me. Tears were streaming down her cheeks.
Sometimes I am a social klutz, “What?”
She sat down at the kitchen table, “Simon left me three days ago.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You have enough pain in your life. You didn’t need me throwing this at you.”
“Erin, you’re my friend. Of course you can throw it at me.”
She stood and pressed herself into my chest. Once again I was comforting her.
That evening we sat on her back porch and she told me about her failed marriage. They had been on the rocks for quite a while. She hoped having a baby would bring them together again. She knew something was wrong about a month ago and she confronted Simon. He told her she was being ridiculous.
Three days ago she was doing laundry and she noticed his underwear smelled like sex. She confronted him. Simon told her that he would be leaving that evening. Erin could find him at his secretary’s apartment. What a shithead!
The day before the party, Simon had filed for divorce citing irreconcilable differences. The only good thing was Simon wasn’t contesting things and was going to give her the house and a nice alimony.
Over the next several months we became very close. We helped each other through a lot of difficult issues. Erin put me down as emergency contact at the day care. Even as we became close I was never able to move out of “the friend zone.” I regularly professed my love and admiration, but I was never taken seriously.
*****
I tried getting Erin to go out on a date, but she always had a lot of reasons she couldn’t go. I tried dating other women, but I kept comparing them to Erin. No one ever measured up.
After one date that didn’t go very well, I was eating lunch with Erin. I was a bit dejected. She had asked me about the evening and I explained how self-centered the woman was. She didn’t seem like she was interested in anything but herself.
Erin asked, “So let me play match maker here. Tell me what you are looking for.”
I thought a moment, “I’m looking for someone to be my partner. Someone I can share my life with. Someone who I can have a comfortable conversation with. Someone that doesn’t judge me. Someone who cares about me.”
Erin nodded, “What else?”
I decided to take a chance, “Ideally she would be brilliant and beautiful. I could picture myself with a vivacious, petite redhead with amazing green eyes.”
She got a puzzled look on her face, “Why would you want anything to do with someone like that?”
“Because there’s a wonderful woman I know who exactly fits those parameters.”
Erin turned a bright shade of red, “So, do you know how to fix a leaky sink?”
Looks like I blew that.
*****
Two years ago I was invited to accompany her on her regular hikes. I immediately accepted, but found that much of our conversation was about her various dates. Despite my efforts to the contrary, I felt like her girlfriend rather than a possible love interest. I was firmly in the ‘friend zone’.
Toward the end of June, Erin invited me to go on a hike. Jacob was going to spend the day with his father and she was free of any child related responsibilities. Her plan was that we’d go into the state forest about four miles, have lunch at a rustic lodge with an incredible view, and then hike back out. I immediately said yes.
Saturday dawned a little overcast with the threat of rain, although it was supposed to clear off and be a lovely day. I ate a hearty breakfast and was ready when she picked me up at 8:30. Although it was overcast, it was warm so I wore a light shirt and shorts. As usual I had my broad brim hat. It was a half hour drive to the trailhead and she was her usual vivacious self, talking about everything and anything.
We both had a light drawstring tote that we could carry essentials in. I had some water, sunscreen, energy bars, and a box of Band-Aids in mine. As we started out there was a light drizzle. Being in the forest, we really only received an occasional drip. After about twenty minutes we heard some thunder.
Erin looked concerned, “What do we do if we’re caught in a thunderstorm?”
“We’ll need to find some place to shelter. Actually, it wouldn’t be a bad idea if we did that now.”
“I have a small umbrella if that helps.”
“Sure. Break it out. We’ll want to find either some ground based shelter like an outcropping or some small trees. We’ll want to stay away from tall stuff.”
Thunder cracked much closer.
Erin pointed to a spot off to the side, “How about that?”
“Yeah. Let’s go for it.”
It was a sheer bluff about twenty feet high. We pressed ourselves against it and Erin raised her small umbrella. I put my arm around her and pulled her close. Suddenly we were in a torrential downpour. Thunder cracked again and Erin jumped, clinging to me. She tried to keep us dry, but the rain came from multiple directions. Then as soon as the rain started, it was over. Thunder was still cracking, but the storm had passed.
She patted my chest, “Sorry I got clingy.”
“It’s perfectly fine.”
We were both soaked to the skin. Erin’s shirt clung to her breasts, her bra clearly visible.
I peeled off my shirt, “Gotta get some of this water out of the shirt. Let me move off to give you some privacy.”
“I don’t need privacy. This is like wearing a bikini.”
She peeled off her shirt and we both wrung them out.
A ray of sunshine fell on us and Erin turned to face the sun. She threw her head back, eyes closed, and arms out stretched. “Oh this feels heavenly.”
I had to check her out. Her breasts were average sized, but still high on her chest. I could detect erect nipples in her bra. She had a couple of stretch marks on her stomach, but it was taut, nothing extra. Her pale skin had freckles everywhere. I was mesmerized by her beautiful body.
Erin said, “I hope you are taking this opportunity to check me out.”
Busted! I came clean, “I am.”
“Do you like what you see?”
“I do. You’re a beautiful woman in fabulous shape.”
“Thank you. You’re pretty good looking yourself.”
“Would you mind if I wrung out this bra?”
“No. I’ll give you privacy.”
“Eric, I really don’t mind if you see me. You’re my best friend. You can see me naked. I’m seeing you naked.”
“Yes, but a man going topless is not the same.”
“I like what I see though.”
She stayed facing the sun, and took off her bra, exposing her breasts. Her pink nipples were at attention. Her quarter-sized areolas were crinkled and cold.
“How do you like me now?”
“Stunningly beautiful.”
If it wasn’t for the wet shorts I would have been sporting a serious erection by this point.
Erin wrung out the water and put her bra back on followed by her shirt, “Damn! That’s cold.”
I put mine back on, “You’re right!”
We returned to the trail and headed out again. We walked about ten minutes in companionable silence.
Erin finally said, “You know what I really like about our friendship?”
“What?”
“We’re comfortable with each other.”
“There is a lot to be said about comfort.”
“Back there I felt completely comfortable stripping down with you. I knew I was safe with you. We’ve been walking and either of us has said a word. We’ve nothing to prove to one another. We know all about each other.”
“It’s nice. Erin…” I suddenly didn’t want to break the spell.
“What?”
“Never mind.”
“No. Tell me.”
“You know I don’t have many friends right?”
“Sure you do.”
“Not many I trust. I fact I think you’re it. You are absolutely my best friend. I love you dearly.”
“I love you too Eric. You’re a terrific friend.”
There! She loves me as a friend, but not anything more. I thought my expression of love was more heart-felt. Erin was telling me she loves me like she would tell one of her girlfriends. How do I show her?
“Erin, do you have any idea how much today means to me?”
She was nodded, “Being with you means a lot to me.”
“Getting to spend the entire day with you is a dream come true for me.”
“Really?”
“I think the most valuable thing we can give another person is our time. Spending today with you means the world to me.”
“I can’t think of a nicer person to give my time to. You’re the best.”
We hiked on in silence for a bit. I feared I had somehow been too forthright in telling Erin how I felt. She certainly didn’t seem to take me seriously.
We crossed a small stream. I jumped across first and looked back. Erin was hesitant to jump. I stood on the edge and held out my hand. She jumped and reached for me at the same time. I caught her hand and pulled. She landed with a foot to spare.
“Eric?”
“Yes, my dear.”
“Do you have any dreams?”
“Not a lot.” I didn’t want to tell her about how I dreamed of being her lover and partner.
“But some?”
“Yeah.”
“Do they involve me?”
“Yeah.”
“Thanks.”
It felt like she was done prying. “How about you?”
“Most of my dreams are dead.”
She was quiet for a hundred yards or so, “Like Anne Hathaway in Les Miserables.” She sang in a beautiful, powerful voice:
“I had a dream my life would be.
So different from this hell I’m living.
So different now from what it seemed.
Now life has killed
The dream I dreamed.”
That snippet of song was heartbreaking. I let the silence reign for a moment.
I said, “Perhaps the finest song from the world’s finest musical.” I looked over at her and tears were streaming down her cheeks. I put my arm around her.
“Simon destroyed my dreams.”
She turned to me and buried her face in my still damp shirt. I hugged her to me and she sobbed. I thought, how many times have I comforted her like this over the years? I kissed the top of her head.
Erin tilted her head back and looked up at me, “Thanks for being my friend. I don’t know how I could have gotten through these past couple of years without you.”
“You’re welcome. You’ve supported me too.”
We began walking again.
*****
Erin was quiet for the remainder of the hike to the lodge. When we got there, it wasn’t crowded. We got a table on the patio with an incredible view. The sky was crystal clear.
The waitress came over and asked, “Can I start you two off with something?”
I held up two fingers, “Two IPAs if you have them.”
“Be right back.”
I said, “I assumed that’s what you would like.”
“You know me so well.”
The waitress returned with our drinks.
I raised my glass, “To friendship.”
Erin smiled, and touched my glass, “To precious friends.”
The toast knocked Erin out of her funk. The rest of the day was amazing. We both had cheeseburgers and a second IPA. The hike back was fun and carefree. She told me some stories of her undergraduate days that I had heard before, but I loved hearing again. She was joking and making funny observations of the world around us.
By the time we got back to my house it was nearly dinner time, “Can I invite you in for some dinner?”
“I should be going. Thanks for a very fun day.”
“Thank you for the best day I have had in a very long time.”
Hugging her would have been awkward in the car and I felt a kiss was out of the question. I just took her hand and squeezed it. I climbed out, retrieved my stuff and walked across the drive.
I thought I heard something. As I turned to wave, Erin jumped into my arms and put her arms around my neck. I dropped my things and returned the hug. She squeezed me tight and whispered, “Thank you.”
She quickly kissed me and ran back to her car. She tooted her horn as she drove off.
*****
We continued hiking together over the rest of the summer. On really warm days Erin would wear a halter top. It wasn’t because she was trying to be sexy and alluring. She just felt very comfortable with me. Several times I tried to move out of the “friend zone”, but my efforts were met with gentle rebuffs.
When the snow started flying we began snowshoeing together. During one of those outings, she told me about a guy she had met. How he was handsome and fun. How happy he made her. I tried very hard to be supportive, but her constant talk about this guy broke my heart. Why couldn’t she see how much I loved her?
His name was Dan. All she talked about was Dan. Throughout the workday it was Dan. At lunch it was Dan. On our winter hikes it was Dan. They spent nearly every Friday and Saturday evening together. While Erin didn’t specifically mention sex, she implied that they were intimate.
About a week before Valentine’s Day, Erin came into work walking on air. Dan had told her that Saturday he was taking her to ‘Floor 44’, one of the fanciest restaurants in town. It was on the top of a building downtown and it was very expensive. While she didn’t say so in so many words, I understood that she believed Dan would pop the question that evening.
On Thursday she left work early to go shopping. She started sending me pictures of her in some amazing dresses. She wanted to know what I thought of each one. Not only was I in the ‘friend zone’, I was now in the ‘girlfriend zone’. I resigned myself that I would never be anything more for her. My heart ached for something that could never be. Even though I was working against my own interests, she was my best friend and I felt like I couldn’t let her down.
I gave her my candid opinion on each dress. Finally, she sent me a picture of her wearing a stunning emerald green dress. It was perfect for her and I told her so. I told her that wearing that dress made her the most beautiful woman in the world. I meant every word.
Saturday afternoon, Erin asked my opinion on how she should wear her hair. I gave her my opinion and she gushed thankfulness. I made myself a lonesome dinner and settled in with a good book.
About 8:30 my phone rang, it was Erin.
“Shouldn’t you be on your date?”
I could hear sobs through the phone, “He didn’t show. I texted him and he said he forgot!”
That pissed me off, “Horseshit, he forgot!”
The sobbing increased, “What…” Sob. “Did…” Sob. “I do?” Sob.
“Erin, you didn’t do a thing. This guy’s a loser if he doesn’t see how sweet and smart and funny you are. Did I mention how beautiful you are?”
The other end of the phone was quiet.
I let the silence hang for a moment, “You’re not doing very well are you?”
“No.”
“Hey, how about if I take you out. Nothing fancy. Just you and me. We’ll go to Tony’s.”
“I wouldn’t be very good company.”
“Garbage! You’re incredible company.”
I drove over and picked her up, then to Tony’s Bar & Grill for dinner. Erin had changed out of the fancy dress, but her hair was still done. The babysitter was still there and I told her we’d be back in a couple of hours.
At Tony’s Erin barely ate and proceeded to have a couple of IPAs too many. All she did was put herself down all night long. I felt so badly for her. Afterward, I drove her home. I steadied her as she stumbled up the steps and through the front door. I made sure the babysitter was paid, saw her to bed, then left.
*****
We had planned on going snowshoeing on Sunday afternoon – Valentine’s Day. I think she planned to celebrate her engagement, but obviously that wasn’t going to happen. I also wondered how hungover she’d be. Around one o’clock I received a text:
Erin: Can we postpone till Saturday? I forgot to make red cupcakes for Jacob. It’s a tradition.
Eric: Same time?
I received a thumbs up.
I wasn’t up for a solo hike so I spent an hour and a half on my treadmill, exercising through my unrequited love.
When I was done, I took my sweaty body to the kitchen where I started to prepare dinner. I heard a loud banging from the back door. I opened the door and found Erin holding a single red cupcake on a plate. I was dumbfounded, just staring at her.
She smiled, “Can I come in? It’s kind of cold.”
“I’m sorry. How rude of me.” I stepped back and Erin stepped in, tears flowing.
“Eric, I have been blind. I’m idiot.” She handed me the plastic wrapped plate. “I have ignored the one man who has loved me unconditionally through thick and thin. Will you forgive me?”
I was dumbfounded. My heart was pounding as I set the plate down. Part of me wanted to believe this was real. Part of me was hesitant.
Finally, I said, “Can I give you a hug?”
She threw herself into my arms, “You can do more than that.”
She kissed me as passionately as I have ever been kissed. She spoke into my mouth, “I need to get back to Jacob, but will you come over for dinner?”
Holding her felt heavenly, “Sure.”
“Will you forgive me for being a dumbass all these years?”
“You’re not a dumbass. You’re brilliant.”
“Yes, but sometimes the brain doesn’t follow where the heart leads.”