I offered a sly smile to my husband, the kind that promises he’s going to get his bones jumped later, as he completes his thought. “Okay, it’s settled. We bring him home with us, where he belongs. I think this will be best for all of us, as long as we can convince him of that!” Mark had a self-assured air about him now; he was pleased with himself.
Mark coughed quietly which brought me back to the present. He started talking to Tim.
“As I told you, brother, you’re family. We need you. We’re not complete without you. You’ll stay with us for as long as you need to stay. Forever, if Brie has anything to say about it.” Mark gestured toward me as he said that. “You stay with us while you complete your apprenticeship and save some money to find your own place. We both want this.”
The only other time I’ve seen tears in Tim’s eyes was at his mother’s service. He looked at us both. I stepped up into his arms, slipping my arms around his broad shoulders. “We both want this, Tim. Really. Please say “Yes,” and come be with your family.”
“Okay.” There it was, my man of few words. That was Tim-speak for: I love you both so much that it hurts, and I don’t know how I manage to breathe without you. You could hear the emotion in his voice even in that one word. My heart soared once again; I was about to have both my boys back in my life, where they belonged.
It took about eight months, but Tim finally separated from the Marines, was accepted into the apprenticeship program in a LA Union, and started classes at a local college. He enjoyed living on the ocean; he surfed every morning and evening when he could. I liked having him close, and I think Mark did too. It was like a missing piece of our puzzle was now back where it belonged.
It’s so hard to explain. The connection among the three of us was unlike anything I’d ever felt before. The nearest thing that even resembled our closeness was the bonding within families. That’s what it felt like, but not exactly.
Our families met some of our needs but not all. Same for our friends. Our connection was, in some ways, more profound than a family connection alone or a friend connection alone. It had elements of both. It was special.
Mark had the outgoing personality; Tim had the reserved one. Tim allowed Mark to lead in most situations. Tim was happy to follow. That part of our relationship met needs that I couldn’t meet for either of them.
I think it gave Mark security. In return, Tim received love and family, and friendship. Tim was alone; his biological family had scattered by then, and all he had was Mark and me. We offered him stability and provided him with a social life. He needed the connection more than he ever wanted to admit he did, especially the one with me. Weirdly, it was like I was his wife as well. I provided the love that I don’t think anyone else could provide to him.
For me, it was love. Plain and true. I loved Mark with all my heart, but Tim completed me. I was a better wife and person when Tim was nearby. Was it sexual? Hell yes. Even though Tim and I weren’t sleeping together, I would fantasize about him when I toyed myself. But that was as far as it went.
It was nearing dusk; I was in the bay window with our telescope watching the surfers when Mark made it home from work.
“Are you watching your boyfriend surf?” That phrase coming from my husband would have sounded strange to someone who didn’t know us. Mark called Tim ‘your boyfriend’ whenever we were alone, and I understood what he meant.