All of these truths were running through his head as he stared at the lunch table where Olivia Wilde sat, alone (though probably not lonely). He turned his head to face the lunch table where his friends sat – hooting and hollering. He gazed back at Olivia, and something snapped. The blatant energy of the student council table suddenly lost its appeal. It had no subtlety, no delicateness, no anticipation. Secretly hoping no one would see him, he swallowed his pride and approached Olivia’s table.
“Hey.” he said with warmth surprising him. “Can I sit here?”
Olivia looked up from her lunch with surprise in her eyes. “Uh, yeah.” she replied slowly, clearly caught off guard.
Phil broke out into a grin. “Great.” he replied as he took a seat. “I didn’t think you would say yes.”
“Why?” she asked, innocently enough to fool anyone. Phil knew her games by now.
He smirked. “Because, I was kinda stammer-y the first time we talked, and I feel like I just annoyed you the second time.”
“I wasn’t trying to be mean. I just didn’t think either of us would get much out of our conversation.” Olivia replied.
“Not one for small talk?” Phil asked, relaxing his posture and taking a hold of his burger.
Olivia shook her head. “If you told me something you never told anyone before and left, that’s a better conversation than small talk for twenty minutes.”
Phil stopped chewing and thought, mainly about anything he could say that was an absolute secret. A weird surge of adrenaline consumed him as he thought what many schoolboys his age was the unthinkable – he would be completely honest. Not like ‘honest,’ like actually honest. Not the honest people liked to hear.
Phil swallowed his bite of food. “I like a challenge.” he began, surprising even himself. “When I saw you there, at the library, hunched up like that, it only made me more curious. I’ve had my fair share of girls but more often than not they fall into my arms and spread their legs pretty well immediately. I kinda see it as a sport – y’know, ‘can I do it?’”
“What is ‘it’?” Olivia asked calmly, digesting his confession way better than Phil ever intended.
Phil shrugged. He now realized he knew the whole time why Olivia was such a stubborn image in his head. “Win you, I guess?” he answered.
“You’re avoiding the question by being vague.” Olivia pointed out.
“I want to know what it’s like to…” Phil gulped. This was it. “…have sex with a girl when she’s not just drunk at a party or really receptive to 2am Facebook messages.” That was the moment when he expected her to get up and leave the table.
Olivia did no such thing. “There’s not that many of those.” she pointed out.
“I find my fair share. So, yes, you’re attractive to me. I’m not looking for a girlfriend though, I just… I just want you.” Phil was sure this was what every guy his age didn’t want to say to every girl his age the proverbial fuckboy was stringing along, and to be honest, this moment of self-reflection kind of frightened him. He knew everything he was saying was uncomfortably true – not just for her, but for an unfortunately large ***********ion of girls at his school he was now almost afraid to look in the eye.
Phil expected Olivia to pause and give that dramatic silent treatment to him for a few seconds to fill the air, perhaps even leave immediately and completely emasculate him. It wasn’t often Phil gave all of the power in the situation to someone else, not the least of which to a girl, and most definitely not a girl nobody had heard of at the school. But instead, she spoke immediately. “So that’s what you want from me?”
Phil swallowed. He hadn’t been this nervous in a long time. “Yes.”
“And what can you offer me in return?”
Phil practically fell out of this chair. Again, the girl didn’t exude confidence in the slightest – she wasn’t teasing, she wasn’t toying with him. She was almost calculating.
Nevertheless, he tried to put on his confident face. “Well, I’ve never heard any complaints from the girls that I’ve been with. If you wanted to do this with me, I’d be down for anything.”
“‘Anything’ isn’t specific.” Olivia pointed out. “Do you have any kinks?”
Phil’s mind was racing, his heart beating. This girl had another level of experience, maybe even more experience than his own. He was rapidly losing the high ground, and unlike some girls that tried to take him down a peg, she wasn’t even openly trying to one-up him. She just had an uncanny talent for stripping away his exterior for the world to see. And he only could barely see it, but she wasn’t even doing anything to manipulate him – she was just asking him to do it to himself. He didn’t even want to dare asking the stupid question of ‘Wait, are you serious?’ or ‘Do you want to have sex with me?’ because knowing the little he did about her, that would be a one-way ticket to him losing his chances with her forever.
“Yeah, a few. I really enjoy dominating – have you ever done real dom/sub stuff before? Like with rope?”
“Yes.” she nodded.
Damn, he thought. “It’s my go-to. I’m into a lot of the rough stuff – rope, choking…” Phil went on, not adding that these were mostly done in his head. He hadn’t actually had any true experience with rope, and only choked a girl once, but figured anything he could say to impress this girl, he should say.
“So you’re offering to have sex with me?” Olivia clarified, showing nothing on her face.
Just as Phil was about to say yes, a blaring sound cut into the conversation. The PA bell had rung to indicate students should be heading to their post-lunch classes. All around the cafeteria, students were getting up to go to classes. Phil’s eyes shot to Olivia, who was also putting her lunch back into her bag.
He was too used to these kinds of clichés as it was. Phil wasn’t going to let this girl get away that easily. “Hey.” he quickly piped up, laying a hand on her arm. “Stay. Let’s skip third period together.”
Olivia looked at him for a few seconds before a small smile (not one of happiness, more like a smile of confidence) crept up on her face. “Yeah, alright.” she replied, sitting back down. Phil promptly opened his bag and took out his chemistry book out.
“This way, it’ll look like we’re just studying together.” Phil reasoned. Olivia nodded, putting her arms down onto the table. “And the answer is yes. That’s what I’m offering. Do you accept?”
Olivia’s small smile returned to her face. “I do.” she replied in an even tone. “Are you saying we do it at school?”
Having sex on school grounds was one of those things that a lot of boys Phil’s age fantasized about, and even liked to claim they did, but at least as far as he knew, very few actually did. “Do you have a particular place you like to do it the most?” Phil asked, both genuinely curious and also trying to imply he had experience without necessarily lying.
Olivia’s trademark serious look returned to her. “I want you to take the lead.” she stated.
“What do you mean?” Phil asked her, caught yet again off guard.
Olivia held up her hand across the table in response. “Take me by this hand to the best place you know, then show me how much you like to take charge.” she replied simply, a little too simply. If Phil hadn’t known better, he would have said a small mischievous smile crept up on her face as he stood up and packed his chemistry book away.