“The doctor asked if it were possible, he had forced himself on you. I couldn’t imagine that, but I knew I had to ask you. Eddie always struck me as a good kid, a nice young man, forcing you into sex seemed beyond any common sense. But I asked you and you told me ‘No, it was mutual.'”
“Tess, I have no idea how and where we went wrong, and you stopped loving me. You never gave me a clue that you were dissatisfied with me as a husband in any way. You never gave me a chance to fix what you felt was broken. Sure, we fought from time to time like every other couple, but you convinced me we were together for life and the love I had for you was the same you had for me.”
“I still can’t believe I never saw this coming or never realized it when it happened. I assume it was more than once, that you had ongoing liaisons, but you were masterful at hiding it from me. Clearly, he never used protection. My pride and happiness as your husband were destroyed in an instant. Now I wonder ‘How many others have there been?’ Were you ever faithful to me? Was it all just a ruse? Am I just the biggest cuckold idiot husband in history?”
“The hour I stayed with you in the hospital before leaving was the worst hour of my life, but I was determined to try and stay calm for the sake of the baby… Michael. I knew if you and I fought it would be terrible for him even as an infant and whatever else, he didn’t deserve that. But finally, I had to get out. I had to get away from the humiliation and disgrace I was experiencing sitting with a woman who mocked me behind my back by fucking another man. A man twelve years her junior. An adult yes, but still a high school student. Someone with whom the school district trusted you. I was quite certain he was somewhere laughing at me too.”
“So, I left to give myself some space. I drove a couple thousand miles in the last week, made a new friend, and got some great advice from her and my dad. Her name is Lori, and she lives in Austin, Texas. I met her completely by accident, but maybe that was one of these moments of fate, because I’m not too proud to say, I think she may have saved my life. She objectively helped me sort through my feelings of being overwhelmed. I was despairing and she gave me a shred of hope. Just enough to get me pointed in the right direction.”
“That brings me to today, Tess. I’m here to speak my mind and hear you speak yours. I know there is nothing you can say now or ever that will take away the trauma of the last week, but I have decided my life is worth living. I’m not a bad guy and I’m not a failure as a man or a husband. I trusted you with my heart and you crushed it. I’ll never trust you again.
“I don’t know what your plans are or even if you have any. But I’m staying put, here in Clarksville and I’m going to move on with my life.”
Drew concluded. “I believe we should divorce as quickly and quietly possible. I assume the high school will not renew your contract for next year, even if they don’t fire you outright. As I said, Eddie is a man, but he is also a student and you violated everything a teacher should stand for. Right now, I hate being in the same room with you. I can’t abide being close to you. Intentionally, or on a sick whim you came close to destroying me and I know I’ll be terribly sad for a while. But I’m going to live my life and make the very most of it. It breaks my heart to know it won’t be with you, but that was the choice you made. Now we both must live with the consequences.”
When Drew began speaking his head was down and his posture was slumped over. But as he spoke, he grew more and more confident and angry. He was not perfect, far from it. But he was a good man, a good partner and friend and a good provider. He knew he didn’t deserve any of what Tess had dished out. He may or may not ever love another woman, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to let a wife who could betray him so deeply control his choices or his well-being. By the time he was finishing his comments he was looking Tess squarely in the eyes with a confidence she could never hurt again.
As Drew spoke Tess went back and forth between crying, looking into his eyes and looking at the floor. She also realized something profoundly true. She had lost him. He was being brave by coming here and facing what she had done to them but there was no mistaking it. He no longer belonged to her, and he never would again.
Tess composed herself and responded. “Drew, I do want to answer a few of your statements. I understand my lies to you mean you probably won’t believe me, but if I’m ever going to heal it must begin with the truth.”
“Eddie and I had sex on four occasions between May and the end of July. I never planned for it to happen the first time, but then it was a bit of a thrill to keep on for a couple of months here and there. I knew it would pass and he would soon be gone. Before that, there never was another man in my life. From the time we met, you are the only man I’ve ever been with sexually until 9 months ago.”
“You never failed me as a husband in any way. I always adored you and our relationship. I don’t know what came over me with Eddie but nothing you did or didn’t do drove me to him. It was all my fault 100%. You are a good man, the best man I’ve ever known or probably will know. I’m confident, with time, you will truly believe what you just said, that you should have a good life. You deserve a good life.”
“I’ve spared the district the distraction of firing me and have resigned. I don’t think anyone is talking about filing any charges against me, but if they do, I’ll face the music. If there is any hope for us, I’ll stay right here in Clarksville and do whatever I can to rebuild our marriage. I desperately hope there is that chance, but if not, I will accept it. We can part without any acrimony on my part.”
She was crying again, “I must tell you how sorry I am for my actions. I am ashamed of myself and what I did to us. I don’t expect you to accept any of this, but I am devastated by how evil I treated you. I have no right to ask your forgiveness, but I owe you the honesty you’ve given me.”
As Tess sobbed Drew gave her a few moments. When she began to settle down, he replied.
“Tess, I don’t know whether to believe you or not, but I do know I’m not going to give you or anyone the chance to repeatedly hurt me. You are correct, our marriage has been destroyed and there is no rebuilding it. I think we can work through a divorce with too much trouble. Jim Cornell is a good man known to both of us and I’m sure his firm can help us sort out what must be done. I’ll call him tomorrow morning unless you have any objections.”
Tess shook her head, “Yes, he is a good man. That would be fine.”
Drew continued, “You can stay in the house as long as you need to. Sooner or later we’ll need to sell it and split the assets. I have no desire to ever sleep in this house again. You’ll have enough money to support you and Michael for at least a year. By then, you should be able to get back on your feet. I’m sure your folks are not happy with you, but they love you and will be there for you”