The Yips Pt. 02 by RobertaBob,RobertaBob

Much later, Bryan was sitting in his leather recliner with a beer and the TV dark, purposefully ignoring the remote on the end table. He did not want to relive any of that game ever again. He did not want to see his team’s ace pitcher self-immolate. Five walks in the first two innings. He did not want to see the parade of relievers who came in and surrendered in their turn four home runs. He especially did not want to see himself.

In the second inning, he had fielded a ground ball and thrown it directly into the dirt a good ten feet short of first. Luckily, Mitch had mad skills and was able to not only pick the ball on the backhand for the out but had actually managed to make it look much less dangerous than it had been.

But Mitch could do nothing when Bryan fired a relay from left field past the catcher and into the visitor’s dugout. Later, he could only watch in dismay as Bryan gunned a routine ground ball so far down the line that Mitch did not even make a move towards it.

Bryan’s normally sharp baseball mind had just shut down in disgust by the eighth inning, blue screened by an internal flaw his software could not fix. Luckily, the whole team had come together to suck as one. Nobody blamed Bryan in particular for the disaster.

He did blame himself, however, which is why he was reclining in his front room still fully dressed in his uniform. Infield dirt residue, steel cleats — the whole kit. Immediately after the last pitch, Bryan had zombie walked through the clubhouse and out to his car and driven home.

He got a second beer and read the note he had left to himself on the refrigerator when he had gotten home from Arizona:

Even if some obstacle comes on the scene, its appearance is only to be compared to that of clouds which drift in front of the sun without ever defeating its light. Seneca.

He mused that Seneca would not have been much of a Red Sox fan with that attitude.

The Globe was going to pin it on him, he knew. The yips were just too appealing as a focal point for clever headlines. All men and women and children could relate to the yips. Not everyone could grasp the subtlety of a pitcher losing his arm slot in the middle of the game, but everyone no matter their profession had fucked up at one point or another in an unexpected way. Most people were just not lucky enough to transform into an incompetent klutz in front of thousands live and millions electronically.

He was in the bathroom drinking his beer with his left hand and aiming his piss with his right when the doorbell rang.

He almost dropped his beer and hosed the floor, but he got both hands under control. Who the hell was here at — he tossed the empty bottle in the trash, buttoned his fly, and checked the clock as he stepped out into the kitchen — ten minutes after midnight?

Which reminded him. The fucking Yankees had fucking won. The fucking White Sox had not even put up a decent fight. He hated Chicago and everyone who had ever lived or played in Chicago. He hated the band and the musical.

The play-in game was tomorrow. He had to get some sleep.

He opened the door and Melody came right in without invitation.

She looked him over from toe to cap. “I thought you guys showered at the park.”

“I jogged home.”

She nodded. Maybe she believes me, he thought.

She wandered into the house and examined first the kitchen, then the living room, then the dining room.

“Why isn’t there a mess? You have a housekeeper?”

“Just me,” he said. “I clean up after myself.”

She turned to face him. “I heard that you played like crap tonight. You especially.”

He had always liked the phrase “bum’s rush”. It was colorful and descriptive and he was about to use one on Ms. Lowell. He imagined her burgandy pants suit after he had tossed her from the door onto his dewy lawn.

“So. You just came here to bust my balls. As usual.”

She grabbed him by the lapels with both hands. Bryan was busy thinking that baseball jerseys didn’t even have lapels when she said, “Asshole.”

And kissed him so hard he forgot his own name for a long minute.

‘What the hell–” He managed to get out when she took her lips away to draw in air.

Then she kissed him again.

And turned him loose.

“Say something in Greek,” she commanded.

Bryan could not figure out how to speak English at the moment, but then some remote part of his brain came to the rescue.

He looked directly into her eyes and recalled a few sentences, then followed with the translation.

“Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.”

He paused. “That was Plato, believe it or not.”

She had somehow gotten wrapped in his arms. She shivered.

“Will you do that when you fuck me?”

“When I…? Well, sure…? I guess.”

Mel took a step back and looked down at herself.

“Not tonight. You got dirt on my jacket.”

Bryan’s logical processors were being whiplashed. His mouth hung open in idiotic misunderstanding.

“Never mind,” she said, brushing the fabric over her breasts and pushing Bryan into a deeper level of erect confusion. “I came to tell you that Owen Archer is currently married to his second wife. The first one left him because of — you might guess this one — his many affairs. The current Mrs. Archer is now living in Torrey Pines and will be moving to New Jersey shortly with their two small children.”

“Shit.” Bryan said absentmindedly, one part of his brain reminding him that his lawyer could have just called him with this revelation.

He would bet the house that Lauren had no idea her white knight already had a fair maiden. Then another thought came to him and he said, “Double shit.” It was pretty much what had happened to Mel with Jaime Rodriguez.

He looked at her. She knew.

“I suppose you are a witch,” he said.

She gave him a disgusted look. “What the fuck kind of thing is that to say?’

“Forget it. Bad analogy.” He thought a moment, then pointed at her. “I thought you were working at your father’s firm.”

“Merger.” She shrugged.

Even her shrug was a legal ploy.

“And you working my case — just a coincidence? The luck of the draw?”

“As far as you know.”

He shook his head. “Fucking shysters.”

She pursed her lips. “Point me to your guest room. I’m not driving back up 95 at this hour.”

“You–”

She stopped him with an open hand. “Don’t go there. I will not be blamed every time you strike out tomorrow.”

“Who said I was going to strike out?”

**********

The Red Sox and the Yankees were tied for first.

**********

Bryan was up early and set out a pregame breakfast of whole wheat toast with blueberry jam, cherry yogurt, and a blender of mango smoothie on the kitchen island. He was just sitting to eat when Melody tiptoed down the stairs wearing one of his University of Texas T-shirts. Bryan went catatonic with a slice of toast halfway to his mouth. Several thoughts elbowed each other aside like the Three Freaking Stooges as they rushed to be first out the door: he hoped that she had found a clean shirt; he wondered if this was ethical; he judged that there was half an inch of white cotton between him knowing if she was born a redhead or not.

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