More comments and feedback appreciated as always.
*****
Mark
That night and morning with Hannah had been, I’ll admit, it had been one of the best days and nights of my life. Anything that came close to that only included them. The day they were born. And pretty much every day since then. I loved my daughters. And now… Well, I guess you could say I loved my daughters.
I had expected Hannah to be far more emotional than she had been that night. She’d always worn her heart on her sleeve, but I think she had wanted what happened so much, she was far too happy to break down in tears every five minutes. But making love with my daughter? Nothing would feel better. I knew that in my heart already.
But that question she asked that morning… I hadn’t expected it. My daughters knew everything that happened between Claire and I. They asked questions, I answered them. I held no secrets. They knew what I’d put up with, what I’d endured, to ensure they would remain in my life full-time. I was one of the few success stories when it came to fathers taking sole custody. Claire hadn’t helped herself. I was able to prove I was the primary caregiver. The courts simply couldn’t award her custody, and once she signed that agreement, and Melissa argued…
Melissa… I hadn’t expected Hannah to ask about her, though I also understood why.
“Daddy, we know what happened with Claire. But what happened with Melissa? She made you happy. Katie and I could see it…”
I lowered my head because it still hurt after two years. I’d had three years to deal with Claire and the pain she caused me by the time I kicked her out of the house. By the time we came to that night, I lived on the hate I felt for her. But Melissa? If ever in my life there was a ‘What if?’ or ‘What might have been’, she was it. Hannah recognised it immediately, sitting on my lap and cuddling me. My girls hated seeing me upset, and I was rarely angry in front of them. Even during the worst days with Claire, I would disappear to the garage and work out whenever I was angry.
“Take a seat, sweetheart,” I said softly, “I guess I never did tell you.”
I finished breakfast, then stood and gestured to the living room. Sitting on the couch, Hannah sat to my right, Katie to my left. Kelly looked a little left out, so I opened my legs, gestured to the floor. Once she sat down, she leaned against my leg as I played with her hair. I put anything I had to say to the back of my mind when she started to cry. That set off Katie and Hannah, lifting Kelly easily, placing her on my lap and cuddling her. “Move in,” I whispered.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. You obviously need love. Your mother is… Well, I know her reputation.”
“She’s too busy doing other things.”
I glanced at my daughters. “We’ll drive to her house, pack what she needs. Can you share a room with her?”
Katie smiled. “Of course, Daddy. It’s a permanent sleepover. She can sleep with either of us.”
“Kelly?”
She turned and straddled me, burrowing her head into my shoulder, sobbing harder than even Hannah at her most emotional moments. She might have been an eighteen-year-old woman, but I was left thinking she’d been left empty of love for too long. Hannah and Katie cuddled into us. “You have two sisters and a daddy now,” Hannah whispered, seeing her cheeks were wet, “Why didn’t we do this sooner?”
I sighed. “Because there’s nothing we could have done. Now we can,” I said sadly. I let Kelly calm down before I sighed again. “Okay, you really want to know about Melissa?”
“Is it sad, Daddy?” Hannah whispered.
“It is a little bit. It’s more a case of…” I sighed. Just thinking about it still called momentary pain. “It’s a case of breaking up with her actually hurt more than Claire.”
“Oh…”
I cleared my throat. “So you obviously know Melissa was my divorce lawyer. We got to know each other well while that was going on. She was obviously beautiful, and rather quickly, there was a lot of flirting going on, despite everything. She knew I found her attractive, and there was no missing she liked what she saw in return. Once the divorce was final, we actually kept in touch.”
I paused and wondered if I should be honest. That wasn’t quite the truth. The day I received the paperwork confirming the divorce was final, I met Melissa in her office and we made love on the couch in her office. And I mean made love. I have no doubt we’d fallen for each other during those few short months. It just took a long time to admit those feelings.
“Once my divorce was final, Melissa and I made love rather quickly,” I admitted, “She knew I was dating, so at that time, we were not exclusive. It suited her at the time, knowing she wasn’t ready for anything serious. She dated. I dated. You remember Suzy?”
“Oh, she really liked you, Daddy,” Katie replied, giggling, “I still wonder if she regrets not trying to snag you for herself.”
“We did meet Tanya once. She was very pretty,” Hannah added.
“Did you have sex with Cassandra?” Katie wondered.
“I did,” I confessed, “She admitted before the divorce that she’d always fancied me. She split up with her boyfriend six months after our divorce. She knew I couldn’t be with her permanently. Too much of a reminder of her sister. But the sex was…” I glanced left and right. “Sure you want to hear?” They both nodded. “The sex was better than anything I ever had with your mother. To be fair, that’s probably unfair on Claire, simply because I find it difficult to remember the good times after what she did. But I knew Cassandra had always liked me. We made love a few times, but she knew it would never be more than that. Would have made the holidays too awkward.”
“When did you and Melissa become something more?” Hannah asked.
“I reckon a year to eighteen months after my divorce. We went from seeing each other once a month, to once a fortnight, to once a week, before we were basically dating and exclusive. That’s when I brought her here the first time. She knew you already, of course. And I loved her. I mean really loved her. I’d have done anything for her.” I took a deep breath. I could talk about Claire and feel nothing. I tried not to think about Melissa at all. It was still a raw wound.
Kelly cuddled me tighter. “It’s okay, Daddy,” she whispered, “We’re here for you.”
I lifted her chin and kissed her properly. Didn’t make her cry this time. Once I pulled back, and saw the smile on her face, Katie and Hannah started to giggle. “She’s in love, Daddy,” Hannah whispered.
“Do you blame her, Hannah?” Katie asked, no doubt rhetorical.
Kelly cuddled into me again, stroking her back, my daughters snuggling to either side. “I’ll admit, it does still hurt. We dated. She adored you two. She really did. She loved staying here with me, getting up to eat breakfast as a family, coming here at the end of the day, sitting down to eat as a family, sitting on this very couch, watching bad TV as a family. But I wanted more. I wanted her as more. I wanted to marry her and have more children. I wanted a son and daughter with her, at the very least…”