I kid. She’s very devoted. I get casual expressions of love all the time, such as hugs from behind when I’m at the kitchen counter, deep kisses while I’m reading on the couch, or sniffs of my armpit when I come in sweaty after working outside shirtless. She’ll also be washing something at the sink and feel my big, firm body cuddle hers as I nuzzle her hair and then lick her earlobe. I place a line of kisses up her neck and whisper that I can’t leave her alone.
We eventually have a conversation in the living room about marrying and having kids. There’s a good exchange of thoughts, and I’ll just say her ideas are even better than mine on a few topics. I’m glad that she’s fine with a quick courthouse ceremony, a reception dinner at a steakhouse, and a honeymoon on the coast. As for the other arrangements, I don’t want her over in the city anymore. She’s admitted she hates living there and is fed up with her job. This is her home now. If worse comes to worst, we can rent out the property and go stay somewhere else, but that’s unlikely.
As the week passes, I hit the weights even harder and take up jogging. I obtain more contract work from a buddy of mine, and a new sales pipeline is developing to bring in more revenue as well. We cook healthy dinners. Our sit-down meals are consumed using proper place settings, and then we assist each other with the dishes. Much cheaper and more comfortable than going out. In the evenings, I make use of an old massage table I have (someone in town was giving it away online) to practice new techniques on her. More reading, talking, and listening to instrumental music, such as Brazilian jazz, fills up the evenings. We make love later, and every session has become extraordinary. She’ll be running her hands on me, and I’m asking out loud why it feels so good. She hugs me and tells me I’m learning to trust. I can gaze at her for hours when she falls asleep before I do. Or instead, I’m looking up at the ceiling and then out the window in contemplation.
We decide when the time has arrived. It will probably happen on the first try. She uses an app on her phone for tracking. The whole process is calm; everything runs naturally of its own accord. I can feel the universe’s power and intelligence at work. We are carried along in the great river of eternity. It’s made clear that we meant every word said in those intense sessions, which have stopped being role-play anymore. She really is mine. I’ll cover her, pour into her, remake everything in our lives through sheer force of my will and desire. Both of us know it’s right.
On the appointed day, we can hear the coyotes yiping outside. They must know what’s up and be celebrating for us. We get naked and put our clothes in the hamper. Then, we shower, lovingly washing each other’s bodies. She radiates even more levels of beauty to me. I can see her taking in my masculinity when she feels my beard and chest. When we finish, she looks at me wide-eyed for a moment, stating that I’m her man and her destiny. The truth is obvious in a way it never had been before. I nod and explain that her mind has made peace with her heart. It now listens to the body’s silent language. We dry each other off as the house darkens near sunset.
There’s a large unused candle in the bedroom, purchased by my mom years ago. This is the right occasion. I light it while thinking of my parents, too.
I watch as she pats herself dry with the towel. She walks over and hugs me. My arms wrap around her shoulders, my hands cradling her head. I protect her from the world. All of its corruption that we’ve been subjected to is so far away now. I’ll be guiding her through the joy soon to emerge from the ether.
She looks up at me. I tell her that we’re going into the bedroom together, and we’re finally going to live.
We do.