“Chav?” replied Riley in mock outrage. “Ay nay, Lord love you, I am not nay chav, Miss Claire, I am gaying to study at the Royal Ackedemy of Fucking. That makes me proper posh totty, dayn’t you think?” She giggled, stuck out her bottom, and emitted a long noisy squelchy fart. “Au revwah, Professor Dickhead, I do declare I em socunting pleased to have met you!” Her exuberant laughter tinkled like a carillon through the corridors of the Royal Academy.
Dr Dick looked absolutely smitten.