Evidently… by JimBob44,JimBob44

“That is correct, Your Honor,” Jamie said. “The home and adjoining apartment belongs to Kurt Schnauder’s mother. My client believes that Mrs. Schnauder is only claiming ownership of the property to deny my client her rightful settlement.”

When Philip produced the pertinent paperwork, Judge Grossman found that the property was indeed owned by one Maisy Schnauder and therefore would not be part of any division of assets. Donna Schnauder was not entitled to any portion of the property.

“Ms. Tismann, your client is employed, is she not?” Judge Grossman asked, poring over the papers provided to him.

“Uh, yes, she is, but uh, because of COVID, she’s been relegated to part-time with Clarkston County’s Budgeting,” Jamie Tismann declared.

“And has been employed with Clarkston County for…hmm, Seven years, eight months,” Judge Grossman mused aloud.

Seth Grossman motioned one of the three bailiffs in his courtroom to approach the bench. He scribbled rapidly on his legal pad and tore the sheet from the pad. The bailiff accepted the sheet and stepped out of the courtroom.

“And, just how long has your client been relegated to part-time status?” Judge Grossman asked, holding Ms. Tismann’s gaze intently.

Well, since we’re on a mandatory lock-down,” Ms. Tismann began.

“I’m aware of the lock-down, counselor,” Judge Grossman snapped. “How long? How long has your client’s hours been reduced to just part-time?”

“Uh, beginning with the last pay cycle,” Jamie admitted.

“Convenient,” Judge Grossman drawled. “And, I’m willing to bet, within sixty days of my decision? Mrs. Schnauder will once again be placed on full time status. Counselor? I’m so confident, I’m willing to bet your disbarment on it. Care to take that wager? Mr. Turner, wipe that smile from your face.””

The bailiff returned and put a sheet of paper in front of Judge Grossman. He read it and smiled maliciously.

“Ms. Tismann? Care to take my wager?” Judge Grossman asked again.

“No, Your Honor,” Ms. Tismann muttered.

“Because according to Ms. Jackson, Mrs. Schnauder’s supervisor, Mrs. Schnauder approached her and requested the reduction of her scheduled hours,” Judge Grossman revealed. “And according to Ms. Jackson, no other employees within her department have had their hours reduced, COVID or not. So, nice try, Mrs. Schnauder.”

Judge Grossman continued to pore over the paperwork. He frowned and flipped back through several pages, then continued his scrutiny of the paperwork.

“Starting salary is thirty seven thousand eight hundred a year. Even when factoring in maximum allowable deductions, hmm,” Judge Grossman said and tapped on his calculator. “Anywhere from twenty three to twenty seven; Ms. Tismann? Where is your client’s financial records?”

They, uh, they’re right in front of you, Your Honor,” Jamie said.

“No. No they are not. I have the bank records for the Schnauders’ joint account here. And according to the pay stubs from Mr. Schnauder’s place of employment, his entire pay check was deposited, via direct deposit into their joint account each first and fifteenth of the month. Mrs. Schnauder deposited five hundred and fifty dollars each month. Again, if we divide by twelve, minus this five fifty, Mrs. Schnauder, where is the fourteen to seventeen hundred going each month?”

Jamie and Donna exchanged looks. Seth Grossman stared at the two women, unblinking.

“Mrs. Schnauder? The court is waiting for your response,” Judge Grossman snapped.

“I uh, the uh the financial records of Mrs. Schnauder are not pertinent to these proceeding,” Jamie offered.

“My courtroom, Ms. Tismann. In my courtroom? I decide what is and what is not pertinent. Not you and not your client, Mr. Turner, I am warning you, get that smile off your face,” Judge Grossman snapped. Now, you have one hour, Mrs. Schnauder. We will break for lunch and reconvene at one pm. At one pm, I expect to have Mrs. Schnauder’s bank statements and her tax filings for the previous three years on my desk. One hour, Mrs. Schnauder. Is that clear?”

Donna almost fainted when Kurt was awarded fifty percent of her savings. She actually snarled in rage when Kurt was also awarded fifty percent of her 4O1K and a repayment of all credit card charges to the Home Comfort Inn for the past three and a half years that she’d been conducting her affair with her married coworker.

“Well, what about half of what he’s getting from that pregnant little slut?” Donna demanded. “Huh? What about that? He’s charging that kid four hundred a month. I don’t get none of that?”

“Moved out last month,” Kurt told Philip.

Jason Ulbrithe had vehemently denied parentage of Nadia’s baby. Jason’s mother and father stood by their son, going so far as to threaten Nadia with a lawsuit if she did not cease and desist with her claims.

On Valentine’s Day, Sigma Phi Gamma threw a Red Hearts party. Jason consumed many shots of Everclear Fireball shots and passed out. In the morning, a frat brother discovered that Jason James Ulbrithe had choked to death on his own vomit.

A few months after burying their only son, Charles and Natalie Ulbrithe remembered the short, chubby girl that claimed she was pregnant with their son’s baby. A DNA test, performed in utero proved that the little girl in Nadia’s belly was indeed the daughter of Jason James Ulbrithe and Charles and Natalie Ulbrithe moved Nadia into their home.

“At present, Your Honor, there is no tenant,” Philip Turner informed Judge Grossman.

“Oh bull fucking shit, you lying mother fucker,” Donna snarled hatefully at Kurt.

“Mrs. Schnauder? Unless you have proof that Mr. Schnauder is lying? That will be five hundred dollars,” Judge Grossman said. “DO you have proof?”

“Way he’s been fawning all over her?” Donna snarled.

“She was cute,” Kurt said to Philip. “Man! Had this ass just wouldn’t quit!”

“You little mother fucker,” Donna snarled at Kurt when the gavel banged down.

“Sucks to be you,” Kurt shrugged. “Tell Melvin I said ‘Hi’ hear?”

Donna’s eyes opened wide at the mention of Melvin’s name; she had not known that Kurt knew the name of her lover. She turned and fled the courtroom.

“So what’s your plans now?” Philip asked as they stepped out into the late afternoon sun.

“Almost dinner time,” Kurt mused, checking his watch. “Mm, half pound burger at Hunter’s Cabin, couple of Gratchley’s I guess. You?”

“Me? This was just another day in the neighborhood for me,” Philip shrugged. “I’m going back to the office and making sure you get my bill on time.”

“That really isn’t all that important, now is it?” Kurt said, smiling tightly.

“I’m putting two kids through college,” Philip smiled, getting into his car.

“No. I’M putting your two kids through college,” Kurt said as Philip prepared to shut his door.

“Hey, just one question,” Philip said, pausing.

“Yeah?” Kurt asked.

“That, I mean, you let, you let Donna get away with a whole bunch of stuff,” Philip said, brow furrowed. “Why? I mean, you did most of the cooking, most of the housework, most of the yard work, paid most of the bills. Why? She wasn’t that great in the sack, was she?”

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