“We need to get you home.”
Rachel nodded. She wobbled on unsteady legs as I helped her walk around the car to the front passenger door.
“Do you have a towel?” Rachel asked as I got into the car next to her. She was searching for her clothes.
“No sorry.” I held my shirt out to her. “Use this.”
“I’ll soak it.”
“You can’t go home dripping wet like that. What would your parents think? Ellen will be asleep by now. I’ll be OK.”
“My parents should be asleep by now too,” Rachel said softly, but she took my shirt and wiped herself down with it anyway.
We pulled our clothes back on in silence. Rachel handed me the keys and I started the car and turned it around. My fingers trembled on the wheel as I drove us out of the forest and back onto the road proper.
“You need to give me the real directions to your parent’s place now, OK?” I was trying to not panic, to concentrate on the details of what I needed to do now to get us both to our respective homes as fast as possible. I tried to ignore the thoughts pressing in on me, the disbelief, the shame, the guilt. I couldn’t believe I’d done that. Been so fucking stupid. I’d never cheated on Ellen, ever. And now I’d just ruined that, and all for a young girl I didn’t even know. I’d allowed myself to be seduced by a fucking teenager.
Rachel directed me with a calm, matter of fact voice, as if nothing unusual had happened that evening. “I had fun,” she said. “We should do that again.”
“We can’t. I’m married. I have kids. That never happened, OK?”
Rachel smiled at me. “You’re so uptight Tom. Like I said, you need a little fun now and again.”
I ignored her.
“Honestly. It’ll be good for your marriage. Trust me. Just don’t tell your wife, OK? She can’t get upset about what she doesn’t know, remember. Don’t do anything stupid.”
“I’d say it’s a little late for not being stupid. Oh Jesus, fuck,” I muttered. “I can’t believe we just did that.”
“Me neither. That was so fucking hot. We have to do that again.”
“We don’t. We can’t.”
“Here.” Rachel reached down and across to pick up something at my feet. She lifted her hand and I saw my phone in her fingers. It must have spilled out of my trousers when I pulled them off. She swiped it open. I cursed myself for not setting a screen lock. “I’ll give you my number,” Rachel said as she began typing.
“No. Don’t,” I said as firmly as I could.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll call myself Nigel in your contacts. That’s the most boring name possible. No one ever suspects a Nigel.” Rachel clicked my phone off and handed it to me.
“Take the left up here,” she pointed. Rachel guided me the rest of the way to her parents’ place. I saw, much to my relief, all the lights were off inside the house as I pulled up outside.
“See. Mum and Dad are in bed. We’re safe.” Rachel leaned over to kiss me.
I flinched away from her.
She shook her head at me. “You’re surprisingly naive for someone your age, you know that Tom?”
“Don’t. Just go.”
Rachel rolled her eyes at me. “OK. Here’s how it’s going to go. You’re going to feel horrible for a couple of days Tom. But don’t do anything stupid. Be nice to your wife, shower her with kisses and compliments, show her how much you love her. Soon, that guilt will pass. But you’re not going to be able to stop thinking about me.”
“Get out of my car.”
She ignored me. She spoke with such confidence. “What we did Tom, you won’t be able to forget that. As the days pass, you’re going to be consumed with desire, you’re going to be nervous with excitement, you’re going to fizz with energy. You’re going to fuck your pretty wife’s brains out. She’ll love it. But you’ll be thinking about me. What we did. What we could do. And believe me,” Rachel reached out and patted my thigh. “Tonight, was just the tip of the iceberg. We’re compatible Tom.”
“We’re not. I’m more than twice your age. We’ve got nothing in common. Get out of my car Rachel.”
She looked across at me with the caring, patronising expression you give to a gentle idiot. “No. We are Tom. I might be young, but I can tell.” She turned in her seat to face me. “I’ve done stuff this year. At university. I’ve played around, I’ve experimented. Like you said. But I’ve never done anything as hot as that. It’s never been so good.”
Despite everything, I was surprised at that. A part of me was proud of it.
“There’s so much I want to try,” Rachel said. “And guys my age, well, they aren’t like you.” She put her hand on my arm, but I shrugged it off. “They’re so rushed. Most of them have no idea how to touch a girl properly. Not like you. I want to do it again. I want to do more. I want to push my boundaries. I want adventure. To live. Don’t you Tom?”
“No. I mean, not like that.”
“Liar.” Rachel turned away from me and opened her door. She slid out but she span and ducked to look back at me. “Give me a call when you want to do it again. When the guilt passes.” Then she slammed the door closed and ran up the drive to her parent’s house.
I felt sick as I drove home. I came up with a plan if Ellen was still up. I was going to tell her the car had broken down. That I’d managed to fix it, but that it had taken a while and that I’d gotten soaked in the rain. I felt shaky with panic when I pulled up onto the drive.
Ellen was in bed when I got home though. She was fast asleep. I showered. I tried not to think about Rachel as I washed every trace of her off my body. I promised myself I’d never speak to her again. I hoped I’d be strong enough.