I looked at her and said firmly, “I wasn’t going to pay to have you fuck around on me. I left you more than enough for your running costs. If you have maxed out, I assume, you’ve been buying the meals, lunches as normal. When you couldn’t, did any of them offer to take you out? To help you.”
Dorothy looked down.
Before she could reply, I continued, “Have you seen any of your old friends? Ones who insisted they pay their share. You cast them aside for these shiny new ones. Why? They were real friends.
“I’ll take you where you want to go. I’ll fill up your car and get groceries for you. Please think about our future and the sort of friends you want.”
We left the restaurant. As we got in the car, I called Belinda. She had everything in hand, I could have the afternoon off. Dorothy and I laughed.
When I finished, I told Dorothy, “She’s after my job. The trouble is she’d probably do it better than me.”
Dorothy didn’t disagree.
I took Dorothy grocery shopping and when I dropped her at the house, I took her car and filled it up. When I came back she invited me in for a coffee. We talked for about half an hour on anything which wasn’t us before I left. I arranged to pick her up for Tuesday’s meeting with Sarah as she felt she may be too emotional to drive. If necessary, I would pay a taxi to take her home (though I didn’t say that to her).
The weekend dragged and Monday was no better. Far too soon on Tuesday it was time to leave and pick Dorothy up.
Sarah welcomed us in. After the introductions, she spoke to Dorothy outlining how she worked and what she required from all parties involved. Dorothy agreed that she would participate as she asked.
Sarah smiled, “Dorothy, what do you wish to achieve in any sessions we have?”
Dorothy looked uneasy, “I don’t know. I do love Jeremy but I don’t know if that is enough to repair, rebuild what we had. I don’t want us to be angry at the other all the time. My emotions are everywhere. What has happened I never expected. My counsellor assured me that Jeremy would be elated to have all the marital decisions made for him as he was so subservient to me. His belligerent attitude and walking out was such a shock. I followed what she said so how did it go so wrong?”
Sarah smiled, “Let’s start with why you went to the first clinic?”
Dorothy looked ill at ease, “Jeremy and I had been trying for children for ages. I had met Yvonne and Susan at the spa and we began talking. They were different to my normal friends, so open. One day, I was upset as my period had started. They saw and asked and I stupidly told them our business. Susan knew this clinic and they talked me into having tests. My results were clear, I had no fertility problem.
“I was going to speak with Jeremy but the clinic said to speak with the counsellor as she would help prepare me for the talk. Susan and Yvonne told me to follow their advice. I did. The first couple of sessions seemed strange as she asked about our sex life as well as my results.
“I was uncomfortable talking about how poor our sex life was. I knew the main responsibility was mine. As I explained to her how I seldom allowed him to do more, she began describing Jeremy’s lack of demand as him wishing me to be more in command. Each session began focussing more and more on that. As I finally accepted that, she said, as Jeremy’s fertility was suspect at best, I could solve my pregnancy problems by taking a lover or two. If I chose someone very close to Jeremy’s characteristics, he wouldn’t know the children weren’t his.
“I couldn’t do that to him. She worked away on me. My new friends were telling me to go for it.
“She began to tell me how to restructure our marriage, how to take control. Firstly, deny him sex. Not difficult as he had stopped asking. In truth, I couldn’t face him as I knew what she was saying was wrong. After each session I was angry at myself but over time that started to change, I began to agree more.
“Jeremy loved to tease my pubic hair so I had it waxed to show I was in control.
“After the big business deal was settled, he made the effort to be at home at normal hours. I went out, to show I was in control. He never tried very hard to stop me. It reinforced the counsellor’s view he wanted me in control. He wanted me to make the decisions as he made them all at work.
“It all blew up when Jeremy saw through the so-called discussion and stormed off. This was not in the plan. This wasn’t meek and mild Jeremy. This was a very angry Jeremy I had never seen before.
“When we argued, later at home, every word he said hit home. I tried to argue for me being in control but I knew he was right. I couldn’t tell him. The counsellor told me it was my own insecurities which were holding me back. I was to force the issue so the following Friday, I did.
“Jeremy left me and sent me divorce papers. I understand his reasoning. I agree with it as viewed through his perspective. What I was allegedly doing was beyond what we had promised each other.
“I’ve hurt him so much, I don’t know if he can ever forgive me, if we can build a new relationship.”
Dorothy was in tears as she spoke. Sarah handed her tissues.
I was mad at her for believing that shit. I was going to speak but Sarah stopped me.
She spoke calmly, “Dorothy, the clinic gave you very bad advice. Every clinic I have worked with wishes both parties to be tested as there are so many combinations which can affect fertility. They should have told you, at the very least to speak with Jeremy. I know that thought would have been difficult especially at the time. Your emotions were raw.
“This counsellor you saw hates men. She is about to be struck of the register due to her brainwashing clients. There have been so many marriages destroyed by her.
“She takes you on when you are so vulnerable and over time conditions you to her way of thinking. Your new friends were happy to see you being misled. They supported her and by doing so made you risk your marriage.
“I know from my sessions with Jeremy, he loves you deeply which is why he is so hurt. You hurt, as you have recognised what you did to him, to you both.
“I can help. I cannot wave a magic wand and make everything disappear but I can help you to go in a direction which you both wish. It will be difficult.”
Dorothy looked at her, sadly, “I’d like to try at least to be friends if I have fucked us up beyond fixable.”
Sarah smiled, “We can do that. Let’s take a step back to the beginning. What were your first impressions of each other?”
I laughed. Sarah looked at me. “Sorry but Dorothy is beautiful. I saw the blond hair and the amazing breasts as she entered the room. She was dressed demurely but she still oozed sex appeal. So, my first impression was – I wanted to fuck her. She batted a few boys away but for some reason she spoke with me. As we did my mindset changed. She was highly intelligent, funny and able to hold a conversation for more than a few moments. I decided she was worth getting to know well so I didn’t try anything sexual for ages. By then I was madly in love with her.”