“This is ridiculous,” she groaned.
“But fun as hell,” Richie said and held the walkie talkie to his lips.
***
Bridget’s elbows were on the dashboard, and her eyes were focused through the windshield on the apartment building where Courtney lived. The last remnants of the day’s thunderstorm pit-pattered against the windows. She couldn’t remember the last time that she’d been on a date, and this was certainly the strangest date that she had ever experienced. She hoped that Joey was having as good of a time as she was. She knew how she could make sure he did.
She smiled, thinking that what she was about to do would have never crossed her mind before Melvin. She had him and the witch and the love juice to thank for that, and if things didn’t turn out the way she wanted them do, she knew that she still wouldn’t ever go back to the way she was before: a major tight-ass.
After all, she barely knew the guy sitting next to her for more than a quick hello and goodbye as she walked by his desk every day, and playing with boys you don’t know wouldn’t be considered very kosher by the likes of her parents, may their souls rest in peace. But it was going to be oh so much fun.
“You know, Joey,” she said, turning her head to face him. “All this secret agent stuff kinda… well, it turns me on. What about you?” She slipped a thumb through her lips and sucked on it coyly. She turned her head to the side, allowing some of her blonde hair to fall in her face. The right strap of her dress strategically fell from her shoulder, and Bridget didn’t bother pushing it back to its upright position.
Joey gulped and said, “Uh… actually… YOU kinda turn me on, Bridget.”
Bridget smiled in reply. “Really?” she said. “Prove it.”
Her delicate hands floated through the air and flittered to Joey’s belt. She saw the crotch of his pants bulging more and more with the evidence of his hard-on; it appeared to be a sizable one which was a good sign for later tonight if Bridget’s plans all fell into place. She unbuckled his belt and took the zipper between her thumb and forefinger and slowly pulled it down. Joey moaned anxiously as Bridget’s hands slipped through his open fly and fished out his raging erection.
“Now, keep your eyes open. We’ve got a job to do, don’t we? And it wouldn’t be very polite of us to let out friends down.” She wrapped her fingers around the thickness of Joey’s flesh; it was hot in her hands. “You’re going to have to stay alert for the both of us,” Bridget instructed as her head began to dip down towards Joey’s stiff, pink pole.
Joey gritted his teeth and forced his eyes open as Bridget’s mouth encased his shaft, and sharp, sweet pleasure coursed over him. So far, this was the best date he’d ever had.
***
“You look amazing,” Melvin said, unable to take his eyes off of Courtney’s gorgeous figure. She wore a black-and-white checkered miniskirt, revealing her mouthwateringly long legs, and a low cut white blouse, unbuttoned to the busty V-curve of her chest. A necklace dangled down her slim neck, glittering in the light. A pair of black boots ended half way up her calves. Her red hair was pulled back into a stylish bun on the back of her head, held by long black pins that Melvin for some reason associated with Japanese women, and Melvin wondered what her hair would look like unfurling and falling to her shoulders: undoubtedly the whole point of having a bun like hers was to get a man desperate to undo it. It was certainly working.
“Thank you,” she said, her cheeks somewhat pink from the flattery.
“Oh yeah, Court. You’re a perfect ten tonight, babe,” Shelly added, her eyes almost as glued to Courtney’s body as Melvin’s were. Both Melvin and Shelly were suddenly knocked out of their daze by a rapping against the apartment door. Melvin blinked, and Shelly almost leapt out of her clothes and to the ceiling in excitement and scurried to the door.
“Tina!” she cried, unlatching the lock and pulling the door open. Melvin felt his own excitement drop and be replaced with another serving of gurgling liquid dread. He stepped closer to Courtney, and she looked at him with her glowing hazel eyes.
“Well, shall we be off?” he asked her, wanting to be out of the apartment before Tina and Shelly could gang up on them and ask to tag along. Courtney’s eyes locked onto his own, and Melvin’s head felt dizzy. It wasn’t unlike the sensation he’d had the first time he’d met the witch and taken her love juice. What was this feeling? Love? Lust? Something else?
“Uncle Melvin?” Tina’s perky voice called over his shoulder. “What are ya doin’ here?” Tina Swift was a cute, curly-haired blonde with curves strategically created to bring men to their knees.
“He’s got a date with my roommate!” Shelly cried, her voice giddy with shrill giggles. Melvin prepared himself and turned around to say hello to his ex wife’s niece and was doubly struck dumb by the fact that Tasha, the female janitor he’d fucked in a supply closet earlier in the day, stood next to her at the door. He vaguely recalled Tasha telling him that she was Tina’s roommate this semester.
“This is Natasha Turner, one of my roommates. Ashley was goin’ out with some obnoxious boy, and I didn’t want to leave Tasha all alone on a Friday night with nothing to do but herself,” Tina said with a bark of laughter. “I hope you don’t mind, Shelly.”
Shelly shook her head, “No, I don’t mind at all! The more the merrier, right?” She slipped a wink in Melvin’s direction. He already did not like the direction the night was turning, and it had barely started. Tasha caught Melvin’s gaze and held it, a funny look on her face.
“It’s nice to meet you, Mr…?” Tasha stuck her hand towards Melvin, and he took it in a firm and steady handshake. Funny that they were pretending to not know each other, and also that he and Tasha had already experienced one another sexually but truly didn’t know each other’s last names. Melvin could hear the witch’s musical laughter ringing in his ears. No doubt that she would be getting a helluva kick out of all of this.
“MacMuffin. Melvin. Nice to meet you, Ms. Turner,” Melvin said, and their pseudo-introductory handshake ended. Melvin shied his eyes away from Tasha’s knowing expression. He couldn’t go through the whole evening like this, trying to cover up his sordid past at every corner, at every turn. The worst thing about it was that the events of his sordid past existed only from the past two days. They were like fresh cuts that still bled if you poked them.
“Well, we don’t want to keep you from your fun,” Melvin said. “So I think we’ll go ahead and get going.”
“Don’t be silly,” Shelly interjected, standing between Melvin and Courtney and slipping her hands around both of their waists, pulling them close. “We can all stick together if you two want. Might be exciting!”
Courtney grinned, dimples forming at the corners of her mouth, and she said sweetly, “It’s all up to Melvin.”
“Don’t worry, Uncle Mel. If you’re worried ‘bout privacy, you’ll barely know we’re there,” Tina said, flashing him her widest smile.