I hadn’t realized how much this was all getting to me until I smelled my own excitement.
I crawled into bed with him, trying deliberately to look as sexy, well, as slutty, as vampy as I could. Back arched, ass up, knees slightly parted.
When I lay down next to him he immediately moved to crawl on top of me.
“No honey,” I breathed, “not so fast now. Take your time.”
I took his hand and guided it to my breast, gently pressing his palm against where my nipple and areola were so hard they hurt.
When he found my nipple with his thumb and forefinger and pinched I gasped and said “easy honey, it’s been a long time.”
And when he rolled my nipple gently I almost came right then.
I guided his hand again, this time using his finger to lift my clitoral hood and find my love bud.
And when he touched it I exploded.
My entire body clenched with the force of my first orgasm in months.
He was up on his elbow looking at me, his eyes wide.
“Are you all right?” he said. “Did I hurt you?”
The wave of giggles that took me left me absolutely breathless.
“No, God no Davey, you didn’t hurt me,” I said. “Oh thank you, baby.”
And I spread my legs for him and said “here baby, take what you want.”
He was awkward and unskilled. I had to guide him with my hand but when he slipped inside of me it was like nothing I had ever imagined. I’m not a virgin. I’ve had men who were bigger and men who were smaller. But as he entered me it was like we matched perfectly. It was like every cell found its mate.
And I was cumming again. And he was cumming too.
And that is how I broke the taboo and my son became a motherfucker.
I was asleep before he pulled out.
July 10, 1961
It seems that sex along with Excedrin and vodka is an excellent remedy for tumor-induced headaches.
After the long July 4th weekend when we were making love every couple of hours we’ve settled into a pattern. We’re a couple now. Husband and wife in all but the legalities.
And I don’t even feel like a cradle robber.
Friday he said he wanted to go out with me. When I asked what he meant he said he wanted to take me on a date and I hurt his feelings when I got the giggles.
Sometimes I forget that he’s only 18.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“What did you do when you were, you know, dating?” he replied.
And that made me stop and think.
I couldn’t take him to a party with friends.
I couldn’t take him to a bar somewhere.
And then I thought of the mountains.
“Let’s go to Red Feathers for the weekend,” I said.
And so we did.
The lodge where we went a couple of times a year had a restaurant, a bar, and live music on Friday and Saturday nights in the summer. I called and they did have a room.
I got him out of school at noon on Friday and we were off in the Cadillac and it felt wonderful.
I realized that for the first time since Davey and I have been, gosh, “involved?” “A couple?”
Anyway, we wouldn’t have to hide that we were together. Oh, I figured we’d get looks, but so what.
In the room, the first thing he wanted to do, of course, was make love.
He’s getting more and more skilled and God he’s a quick learner.
He had me on the bed, my knees pulled up until they touched my boobs while he played with my clitoris, taking me to the edge and holding me there until my breathing was little pants punctuated by “please baby, please Davey, please honey, please baby…..”
But he didn’t finish me. Instead, he got off of the bed and took off his clothes, telling me to stay there.
God, I was so excited watching him.
And as he took his position, his knees touching my ass in that awkward position he had me in, and then as he guided himself inside of me he was telling me “wait now mom, don’t you cum yet.”
I was SO close I didn’t think I could hold back.
“Wait now, wait for me,” he kept saying as his rhythm sped up.
And then suddenly “now” and we were cumming together and I thought my head would explode. It hurt, but it felt good all at once.
When I could breathe again I managed to whisper “where did you learn that?” And he just smiled and tapped his temple with a forefinger.
And then the headache struck with such force I almost passed out. I laid there, sort of whimpering, while he got my vodka bottle out of the suitcase.
July 16, 1961
What a wonderful weekend it was.