It was now becoming clearer to Edward what upset his wife. “I love you and do not want to hurt you. I am not pushing you into anything. You need to know I have no interest in having sex with another woman, and I’ve never asked or even suggested anything like that.”
“I don’t believe you! You seem to keep pushing for more!” Susan said, dabbing her tears. “You saw what happened in the dunes today. I’ve never seen anything like that. It was, well, just…so…overwhelming!”
Susan was obviously upset, but not necessarily solely with her husband. What she was upset most about was the truth hidden by her own denial. She could not believe what she had done on the beach, taking her exhibitionism to a new extreme. And she watched a woman older than her achieve unbelievable sexual satisfaction, and to say she was curious would be an understatement. She WAS turned on by the possibilities presented to her. But the frightening truth was the realization of a deep dark part of HER wanting to be THAT woman!
“At the end, I don’t know where this will go,” Susan continued. “What if you are tempted? What if I am tempted? I am scared Edward — scared that our relationship will be scarred forever, and worried that our marriage may not survive,” Susan said after wiping more tears.
“You have nothing to worry about. Our relationship is strong. Our commitment to each other is unwavering,” Edward said with conviction. “And yes, I agree we are in a super sexed-up atmosphere. But there is no obligation for us to physically participate, in anything. As you saw, many people just watch and simply take in the atmosphere.”
Susan rolled her eyes and turned away.
“Sweetheart, when we talked about coming here, we knew we would be exposed to some extreme things, and we both agreed we would be open-minded about experiences that could enhance our sex life,” pleaded Edward, reminding his wife this was a mutual decision. “We both agreed this would not only be a learning experience, but something that we could use to better our own relationship.”
Susan shook her head and did not respond.
“It’s hard to explain and even harder for you to understand, I suppose. But, you are the hottest, sexiest, woman that I know – and I am so proud to call you my wife,” Edward explained while nervously fidgeting from side to side. “Showing you off to other men creates a sexual excitement inside me that I have never felt otherwise. Nothing even comes close…it is almost like a drug! I loved that you came out of your mom shell earlier.”
As her husband took another drink Susan noticed his hand shaking, realizing he was as nervous as she felt. Why would he be nervous, she thought? This was all his idea in the first place! But Edward’s sincerity was obvious. She smiled at his complement.
Finally, Edward noticed a connection with his wife. He elected to continue to reinforce the positives in a continued effort to try to assuage her concerns.
“I saw those men on the beach looking you over. They thought you looked sexy and they lusted after you.”
Susan looked down, perhaps a little embarrassed.
“And you deserve it. You dedicated so much to raising our family, and you dedicated so much to keep your body fit. Now is the time for you to enjoy other aspects life and the complements bestowed on you from others.”
“I know I am just repeating myself now… do you think less of me because of what I did?” Susan asked.
“Of course not! I love seeing you be a bad girl from time to time! And why shouldn’t you? You are just too hot, and too sexy to let those opportunities pass without allowing yourself to explore things further,” Edward explained. “Hey, I don’t get to show off my pretty wife enough!” he told her with a wink and a grin.
“And for me, the thought that those guys may be jerking off to your image right now is just so fucking arousing!”
Susan’s face heated, blushing from her husband’s lewd statement. Yet although still embarrassed, to her dismay she also felt her pulse speeding up, her face reddening, not from humiliation, but from the carnal images his comment brought about in her head.
Defiant to her reticence, Susan sat up, grabbed the hem of her cover-up, pulled it over her head, and tossed it on an adjacent lounger. She felt grateful for her husband’s kind words, realizing he was correct in one thing, she had nothing to be ashamed of – she spent a lot of time maintaining her figure and should be proud of it! So why not show it off?
Edward sat in momentarily speechless disbelief, looking at his wife. “Thank-you, sweetheart! That’s the sexy confidence I love!” he finally said.
As she lay back, Susan heard a patio door open. A man in the room directly above theirs came out onto the balcony. Above him on the top floor another couple was sitting on chairs looking down on them. All were clothed. The normally ‘shy’ side of Susan would not sit naked poolside in clear sight of other hotel patrons. Strangely, she felt no urge to cover-up.
And stranger still, she felt a thrill deep within her body at the sudden attention she was garnishing. It brought back those moments when they ventured to the non-nude beach.
“OK,” she said shyly, wondering what the hell prompted her to do what she just did. She looked directly at her husband again and asked, “But I need to understand…how far exactly do you want me to play along?” she questioned him, willing to at least try and make this a game for her husband.
“Well,” Edward started, unable to hide the anxiousness in his voice. “I love and will be forever grateful that you agreed to come here…”
“Well, I know I agreed to come here, but I really didn’t expect this,” Susan said interrupting Edward and trying to ignore her watchers. “I mean, this is not the nude beach experience I expected. This whole town is in sexual overdrive!”
“I know that, and now seeing you so upset…it is crushing to me. I mean, I really thought you were getting into it. This is about experiencing this together, and perhaps growing our sexuality together. And let me reiterate, I have no desire to be with another woman. I told you that many times…”
“And you’re all I want!” Susan admonished, as Edward tried to forge an explanation. “I do not need, nor do I want, to have sex with another man! And I know it turns you on – thinking about me doing more than just teasing and flirting with other guys. But that is not something I want!” If you can’t accept that, you can find another woman to satisfy your perverted fantasies!”
While Susan was blaming her husband, in reality, she was confused and distracted by her own thoughts. She could feel a knot in the pit of her stomach. If she were to be honest with herself, the attention on her was addicting. Part of her wanted her husband to continue to persuade, and even coerce her into staying and experiencing more of this libertine lifestyle. But in her mind, she didn’t want to admit to her desires, and she didn’t want the guilt if any trouble resulted. She needed to be able to say, ‘I only did this because you wanted me to. I only did this for you.’