“I told you that!”
“Okay, but what if he doesn’t want to?”
“Why on earth wouldn’t he want to?” Another chuckle. “What guy is going to turn down free sex? Anyway, I’m cute as a button. I’ve seen him look at me.”
“He can look all he wants–but he knows you’re my daughter. I would think that would freak him out.”
“Maybe. Why don’t you ask him?”
“I am not going to ask him! What will he think of us?”
“Oh, Mom, just give it a shot. All he can do is say no.”
Joyce looked at her daughter as if she were a creature from outer space. “I’m not even sure I know you anymore. But okay, I’ll ask him.”
She decided that she might as well get this awkward discussion over with as soon as possible.
Gerald was lounging in a room on the first floor that he’d turned into a study. While he was sitting at a desk fiddling on the computer, Joyce slipped into an easy chair across from him.
“Hello, dear,” he said absently.
“Hello, Gerald,” Joyce said.
He noticed the curious tone of her voice. “Anything wrong?”
“No, no.” She laughed nervously. “Something funny just happened, though. You’ll really laugh at this.”
“What’s that?”
“Well, you see . . . Hilary said she wanted you to”–she paused for a moment, then in a rush of words went on–“take her virginity.”
There was a dead silence in the room that lasted several seconds. Gerald stopped his work on the computer and looked over to Joyce.
“She said what?” he said quietly.
Another big sigh. “She wants you to take her virginity before she goes off to college. She thinks it’ll be better that way if she meets a boy she wants to–you know, bed down with.”
Gerald peered at Joyce as if she’d asked him to run a marathon naked. “Why me, exactly?”
“She thinks you’re really nice. Her acquaintance with nice men is apparently pretty limited.”
Gerald digested that for a moment. Then he said, “Joyce, are you trying to trick me?”
“Trick you? What do you mean?”
“Are you trying to get me to admit that I have the hots for your daughter?”
“No, no! She’s quite sincere about this, so far as I can tell.”
“What about you? What do you feel about it?”
“Well, it’s a bit–irregular. But if you really want to do it–”
“This is not my decision. It’s your decision.”
“Mine? How can it be mine? It’s your and Hilary’s decision. She’s an adult, as she keeps reminding me.”
“It’s your decision because I’m your–I’m in a relationship with you, not her.”
“I get that. But–”
“So if you don’t want me to do this–and I can’t imagine you would–then of course I won’t do it.”
“Do you want to do it?”
“Now you’re trying to trap me again.”
“I’m not! Really I’m not. If you two want to do it, then it’s okay by me.”
“Really? You’re absolutely sure about it?”
“Yes. So you’re saying you want to?”
“I actually don’t–”
“You don’t? Why not? You don’t find her attractive?”
“She’s awfully cute–”
“Yeah, that’s what she says.”
“–but she’s your daughter, so it would be pretty strange.”
“Yes, I suppose so. But she seems to have her heart set on it, and I’ve never been able to say no to her. So you’ll do it?”
“Well, I suppose so.”
“Good! How about tonight?”
“Tonight! That’s awfully fast.”
“No time like the present. Anyway, she seems to be in a hurry.”
“Well, okay.”
“Great. I’ll give her the good news.”
Joyce waited until she and her daughter were getting dinner ready. While Joyce was marinating some chicken and Hilary was preparing a hefty green salad, Joyce said with faux casualness, “Okay, dear, you’re on with Gerald tonight.”
Hilary almost choked on the piece of radish she’d stuck in her mouth. “What did you say?”
“I said, you and Gerald will be, um, cuddling tonight.”
“You mean it? Tonight? Oh-boy, oh-boy!”
“You don’t have to be quite so excited.”
“Well, it’s a big deal, isn’t it?”
“It certainly is. But just to clarify one point: you’re not going to, um, get knocked up, are you?”
Hilary rolled her eyes. “Jeez, Mom, I’m not that stupid. I’m not ovulating, if that’s what you mean.”
“Just checking.”
“You gonna give me some tips on what to do?”
“I’m sure you know what to do.”
“I know the basics. But can’t you tell me anything?”
Joyce paused for a fraction of a second. “Well, there is something I’d better tell you.”
“What?”
“It’s just this: Gerald’s member is, shall we say, rather substantial.”
Hilary grinned broadly. “You mean he has a big cock? Can’t you just say it like a regular person? ‘His member is rather substantial.’ Gee whiz, Mom, we’re not in the nineteenth century.”
“I just thought you should know.”
“Well, how big is big?”
Joyce held out her hands about eight inches apart.
Hilary raised her eyebrows. For the first time her enthusiasm seemed a little dampened. “Wow, that is big. Do you think he’ll be able to get it in me?”
“I don’t think he’ll go in all the way.”
“Thank heaven for small mercies. It’ll hurt, I guess.”
“Of course it will. You do still have your hymen, don’t you?”
“Sure I do!”
“Well, I don’t know. Some girls stick things up themselves and break their own hymens.”
“I’ve never stuck anything up myself, Mom.”
“Good to hear. Well, it’ll hurt, and you’ll bleed a little.”
“Only a little, right?”
“Right. It’s never very much.”
“Fine. Anything else I should know?”
“Well, you must know all about foreplay.”
“You mean sucking his cock?”
“That’s one thing.”
“He likes that?”
“Of course. Every man likes that.”
“Will he do stuff to me–foreplay, I mean?”
“I’m sure he will. He’s very considerate.”
“Well, yes.”
“Wonderful! I love to come!”
This enlightening conversation was interrupted by the man of the hour, who sauntered hesitantly into the kitchen. The women’s talk came to an abrupt end, but Gerald could tell from their red faces that he had been the subject of discussion.
Dinner was a strange affair, as the three of them sat around trying to pretend that the thing that was going to happen that night–Gerald taking Hilary to bed–wasn’t really going to happen. And yet, Hilary was as bubbly and chatty as always, not aware that the two older people at the table weren’t saying very much.
After dinner, the three of them tried to watch a movie, but no one could remember any of it after it was over. When they had turned the lights back on in the living room, Hilary gazed wide-eyed at Joyce and said, “Is it time, Mom?”
Joyce heaved a big sigh. “I suppose it is. You two go up and–enjoy yourselves.”
“Yippee!” Hilary gushed as she leaped up from the sofa, dragged Gerald to a standing position and led him upstairs.
Joyce had magnanimously let the couple use the master bedroom for this sacred occasion. Hilary, bold as brass as she usually was, experienced a bit of awe when she entered the room that was usually off-limits to her, and especially at the big king-size bed. (This was not in fact the bed or the room where she’d been conceived almost nineteen years ago: Joyce and Richard had lived in a crummy little apartment at the time.)
Twirling around in an ecstasy of anticipation, she began tossing off her clothes with abandon–halter top, short-shorts, bra, and panties. When she stood naked in front of Gerald, it was he who gawked at her with awe and wonder.
She was super-petite–only five foot two, and with the figure of a pixie or elf. This wasn’t to say she didn’t have nice curves: the swell of her hips and bottom was enough to make any man salivate. And although she was constantly denigrating her smallish breasts, they suited her general figure perfectly. As Gerald looked at her, he couldn’t help letting out a whimper. But otherwise he remained motionless in the middle of the room.