“and i was jealous of you… so very jealous. i cried so many tears.”
“i’m so sorry amy. please forgive me. i can live without him, but it appears that you can’t. and he seems to be totally in love with you. you know… it always pissed me off, but he utters your name in his sleep.”
“really?”
“our relationship was always more about sex than about love.”
“i could see that.”
“brad is the best in bed. there is no one better. trust me on that.”
“lucky me.”
“umm. by the way… uhh… do you think you could share your marriage bed with me sometime?”
“brenda!! ha. ha. wait… you’re serious aren’t you?”
“umm.”
“would you have shared him with me if he was your husband, and i had asked?
“no. in truth, no. because i know he loves you more than he loves me.”
“so, you’re saying that you’re just not a threat to my marriage?”
“i think i’m not.”
“well, i won’t say yes now, but we’ll see what the future brings. who knows?”
“i love you amy.”
“just never do it behind my back… without me there. you know i would never ever betray you.”
“deal.”
“ha. my spoiled big sister just might get her favorite dick back in her again,” she whispered in her ear.
“i might even surprise you and return the favor with intense pleasure from somebody i dearly love, but you’d need to wear a blindfold.”
“you’re so naughty, brenda.”
they both laughed as they hugged again, cheek to cheek.
“you’re a lucky girl, amy.”
“oh… i know. i know. this is the happiest day of my life.”
“so what’s next for you?
“i think i might be pregnant,” amy whispered into brenda’s ear.
“really? i think i might be pregnant too,” brenda whispered back.
women living under the same roof often have their cycles in sync, and so it was with these two. it seems that brenda had planned to get pregnant on her wedding night and so there were no pills in her purse either.
groomsmen and the maid of honor
“hi guys. i’m claire.”
“oh yea… the last minute maid of honor replacement,” replied sean, smiling.
“well, you didn’t think that amy could be her own maid of honor, did you?” laughed claire.
“for sure no.”
“and you three are brad’s reliable groomsmen?”
“reliable?? yea… very reliable,” answered helmut.
“i hear that you were a big help to brad and amy this morning.”
“oh yea. brad was about to get the crap beat out of him, and amy… well, i wanted to ‘help’ her, but brad wouldn’t let me,” laughed sean.
both claire and kevin blushed at that comment since they all knew how amy was positioned at the time when sean wanted to ‘help’ her.
“well, amy did warn me that you three had a naughty side to you. do i need to warn my friends?” wondered claire out loud.
“you mean those three other cute bridesmaids over there?” wondered kevin.
“yea. they need to meet nice men, not scoundrels like you guys.”
“i… i… i’m not a scoundrel,” protested kevin.
“but i’m sure you could be,” laughed claire teasing kevin and tousling his hair.
“then you need to introduce them to roger, the best man,” offered helmut.
“hmm. roger? you’re the fourth person to tell me that. where is roger?”
“i think he’s in the men’s room. brad told him he had to go over and get to know you, and i think he got scared.”
“scared of me?”
“yea. you’re really scary,” laughed sean standing eye to eye and toe to toe with claire. sean was only an inch taller.
clair hit him in the chin with a gentle fist and in the gut with a much firmer fist. sean leaned in pretending to be injured and surprised claire with a sudden and playful kiss on her lips while capturing both her arms in a bear hug.
“well… if you don’t like roger, please come back for me,” pleaded sean, whispering in her ear.
“i might just do that.”
sean kissed her neck just below claire’s ear and she shuddered as she wriggled free and started to run off.
“i’m off to warn my friends,” she shouted back to them with a smile and a laugh.
sister-in-law surprises brother-in-law
“guess who?” brenda whispered, putting her hands over brad’s eyes from behind.
“my beautiful bride.”
“you got that right… but you married your skinny sweet loving bride instead.”
brad spun around in shock.
“brenda! you’re here… and not trying to kill me.”
“yea.. i spent so much time putting all this together. how could i miss it?”
brenda was putting two sets of keys in brad’s hands.
“what’s this? your benz? you love your car. it’s really special.”
“this is your wedding gift. amy will look really good riding with you.”
“i’m… i’m sorry brenda.”
“no brad. your indiscretions pale in comparison to mine. i should have believed you this morning.”
“i wasn’t lying.”
“i know that now. you have always been worthy of my trust, and if i had trusted you, i’d now be married to you.”
“still, i feel badly.”
“be happy. i’ll get over you, and probably a lot sooner than i should.”
“can we be friends?”
“better than friends. i’ll be the best sister-in-law you could hope for… and maybe even more,” she whispered the last part.
“really? oh. oh. what does that mean?”
“go ask amy.”
maid of honor finds the best man
“hi there. are you roger? umm, the best man?”
“yea… yes.”
“why are you hiding over here?”
“uhhh… you’re the maid of honor, aren’t you?”
“yes i am. my name is claire. and i found you… so… tell me about your research.”
“my research? oh… sure… i’d love to. are… are you a scientist too?”
“i go to mit. i’m an undergraduate there in course v.”
“really? i’m in biophysics at caltech. they’re related.”
“i know that, you cute little boy.”
“i’m… i don’t think i qualify for little boy any more.”
“and i’m not a little girl either.”
“ummm. uhh.”
“shall we play some big boy and big girl games?”
“uh…like what?”
“like talking science and kissing… i want you to kiss me roger.”
“yea? ok. i’m…”
“you’re what?”
“i haven’t done much kissing,” he confessed.
“that’s ok. we’ll take it slow and easy… like an oblate ellipsoid in a low reynolds number fluid.
“oh… i think i’m going to really like you, claire.”
he moved in to try to kiss claire. she pushed him away.
“huh?” roger was confused.
“tell me about your research first.”
“oh. but why science first?”
“because once i start kissing you, your brain will be useless.”
“oh. ok.”
and so roger gave claire a 15 minute lecture covering all of the major points of his research in some detail. claire took it all in and even had some clever ideas for roger to think about.”
“wow. you really are smart,” exclaimed roger.
“…better believe it. enough science… kiss me already.”
they kissed. it was clumsy but they both enjoyed it.
“with practice, we’ll be better,” claire offered.
“can we practice?”
“yes… and other stuff too…” clair wanted a reliable lover she could give up her virginity to.
“now?”
“yes, but other stuff later.”
“when later?”
“every day until the end of summer later, when i need to return to cambridge.”
“oh. ok. so you’d be like my girlfriend?”
“how in hell did someone as dumb as you get into caltech?”
“oh… um… well…”
“shut up and kiss me again.”
groomsmen dance with brenda
“you guys!” brenda blushed as she bumped into the three groomsmen.
“oh… hi brenda,” replied sean with a smirk.
“i… i didn’t expect to see you here,” stuttered kevin as he blushed profusely.
“yea? …but i am.”
“we’re sorry,” blurted out kevin who was wracked with guilt for what they all did to brenda in the morning.