“I’m finished,” I said while silently cursing her.
Carol surveyed the garden, her beady eyes dancing around from behind her glasses. She scoffed at a few areas, before she pointed accusingly towards the drive way. “Look at that,” she fumed. “There’s grass clippings everywhere.” She then groaned and batted both her arms in its direction. “Don’t you even know how to do a job properly? I should have got some border jumper to do this. At least they follow instructions properly.”
I was shocked at the way she was speaking, and the outrageous bigotry from her lips, but still, I turned surprised and saw that she was correct. One of the black liners that I’d filled with grass must have blown open in the wind, and a few stray clippings had sprayed over the driveway. It was no more than a one-minute job to clean it up, and though exhausted, I sighed and headed over to do it.
“You want me to have a garden as messy as yours, do you? Hoping I’ll have to issue a fine to myself, are you?”
“No,” I said, while looking up at her confused as I swept the driveway. “It was a mistake.”
“You seem to make a lot of those, don’t you? If you’re going to do something, then you should at least do it properly.”
I closed my eyes, before letting out a deep breath at the entitled way she was behaving. Despite the strange feelings that had been spurring me on to do her bidding all afternoon, my body was wrecked and my mind was at the end of its tether. Her pokes and prods were relentless, and despite my best efforts, I uncontrollably snapped, “You know what?” I paused in the sweeping. “You’re welcome to do this yourself, if you prefer? I’ve been more than accommodating in this whole thing.”
“Excuse me, young lady? I’m the one that’s been accommodating,” she snarled, “but, you know what?” She snapped her fingers, already turning back towards her bedroom. “If you’re going to give me attitude, then to the office we go. Right now. We need to have a discussion.”
I stood there open-mouthed while she marched off into her bedroom. I was still stood on the driveway, clutching the broom and at the point of being finished. All I had to have done was kept silent and swept the last few clippings up and my unfair debt would have been paid off. I’d been on the brink of being free from Carol’s tyranny. Yet, she’d been pushing my buttons all afternoon, taunting and goading me while I offered her free labour, and I’d been responding more and more submissively. My outburst had to have been because I was simply exhausted and it seemed like there was nothing I could do to make her happy. She had ridiculous unreasonable standards and it was as if she felt like I just existed to do as she told me, however rude and demanding she was being. Perhaps she had been getting away with this kind of behaviour for years. Maybe everyone tip-toed around her and she was just used to pointing and barking orders to other adults as if they were her underlings.
My mind wandered back to the muffins. Was that why that woman had baked her fresh muffins? It wasn’t a nice act between neighbours, but rather one adult sucking up to another which held power over them? I mean, maybe they’d all adopted the strategy that it was better to adhere to this tyrannical Karen than try to oppose and mock her. What had Carol’s response been? She’d given the damn muffins away and insulted that sweet lady’s baking skills.
I suddenly felt overwhelmed by everything, as if I was completely out of my depth and I’d poked the bee hive by not immediately cancelling my BBQ when Carol had insisted. I’d basically put myself in her cross-hairs and now it seemed like she was going to be petty and annoying to me forever more. I was already envisioning the months ahead, where she’d be peering into my home from the sidewalk and finding any reason to make my life miserable, that stupid Homeowner Association agreement wielded as a weapon. Maybe the right course of action was just tip-toeing around her like everyone else seemed to do. I mean, it had been working pretty well all afternoon, hadn’t it? I had even felt strangely good while seeing her relax at my expense; working hard so this Karen could revel in her seizure of my weekend. My day of rest twisted to a day of free labour. I shuddered at the mere recollection of that injustice. God, why did my body keep responding in this way to being unfairly mistreated by her?
Before I could even finish up trying to save the situation, Carol appeared at the front door, and beckoned me with a crooked finger. “Didn’t you hear me, girl? Office. Now.” Her eyes were narrowed through her spectacles. “You need an attitude adjustment.”
Her tone was so commanding and expectant, and her once again referring to me as ‘girl’ made me feel tiny in her presence. Before I could squeak out a pitiful ‘yes, ma’am’, she’d already turned and disappeared back into the house, as if she knew I was going to obey. I thought about just slamming the broom down and marching home. I mean, why was I wasting my day off doing whatever this unbearable woman demanded? Ever since I’d moved into this community, she’d made my experience a living hell. She’d pretty much drained all of my enjoyment and enthusiasm from my achievement. Now, to rub salt in the wound, I was being forced to suffer in her presence and basically serve her in order to pay off the make-believe debt that she’d landed me with. Still, with the thought of being dragged to court in the back of my mind, and subsequent fines and fees mounting up, I knew I had no other choice than to do what she said. I couldn’t afford a lawyer, and despite being extremely annoying, it seemed that Carol was wealthy and well-connected. That’s the only reason I was working for, wasn’t it? I tried to delude myself that this was the case. It wasn’t because of the way working for her made me…feel, was it? How I became all warm, fuzzy and submissive whenever I caught sight of her relaxing while barking orders at my exhausted self? I swallowed nervously as my mind considered how deep into this I was getting; questioning my very own identity.
To make matters worse, those final words lingered in the air: you need an attitude adjustment. What the hell did that even mean? She almost sounded like some strict principal that was about to dish out a punishment with her trusty cane. I mean, I was a grown, adult woman. I was independent and successful. Yet, this unbearable Karen summoned me inside so she could apparently discipline me for something as simple as talking back. Talking back after working slavishly for her all day? It was ludicrous, and in being so, bizarrely intriguing. Once more, those same feelings of unfairness and injustice came seeping back into me, and I was having visions of just what kind of way Carol intended to adjust my attitude. Was she going to lecture me? Was she going to…spank me? I blushed right there on her doorstep while picturing that scene, bent over Carol’s lap while she smacked my ass and scolded me for talking back to her. I was almost dizzy while picturing the utter humiliation of being physically disciplined by a Karen; told that I was in the wrong again and again while knowing I was clearly in the right.
Will there a part 2?