Carol huffed, before looking up at me in silence. She seemed on the verge of snapping some retort at me, however, she paused, and instead she fingered the corner of the current page she was reading. She considered me for a moment, before glancing at the cheque, then adjusting her position to make herself more comfortable. She bent one knee slightly, crossing the other leg over it so that one foot dangled in the air. “Why are you still here?” she asked impatiently. “What is it you want?”
“I…ummm…just want to know that everything is settled,” I said uneasily. “I don’t want to have to bother you again.” I flinched at the implication of my words. Why the hell was I using language like that? She was the one that was constantly bothering me. She was the inconvenience, not me.
She’d closed the book and was tapping the leather cover with her index finger by this point, while she stared at me, apparently lost in a deep thought. “Apologise,” she said, as a small smile came to her lips. “If you feel the need to still be here, then you can apologise for your behaviour over the past week. That was the second part of your penalty, wasn’t it?”
“Excuse me?” I asked, somewhat surprised. I had no intention of apologising as it was her behaviour that had been completely unreasonable. I just wanted some reassurance that as soon as I got home, I wasn’t going to find another letter posted in my mailbox sanctioning me for a further made-up infraction. “No, I had to remove the BBQ and apologise, or pay the fine. You said I missed the chance for the first part, so I’m here to pay the fine.”
Carol shrugged. “Well, since you’re here, it would be polite to apologise anyway, wouldn’t it? Call it a gesture of goodwill. So, apologise for all of the drama you’ve caused. You could have just accepted your mistake and dealt with it immediately like an adult. BBQ gone. Apology. No fine. Simple as that, but no, instead you’ve prolonged this and taken up a lot of my valuable time.”
“What?” I asked in astonishment as she castigated me as if I were a child. “That’s not what happened at all.” I suddenly felt more reassured in my position; I wasn’t in the wrong after all. “I’m not apologising for that.”
Carol scoffed. “So, if you’ve no intention of apologising for your immature behaviour, then why are you still here and blocking my sun?”
I realised that I was casting a shadow over her, and I stepped aside while muttering, “I just want this over with.”
She dismissively flicked her fingers at me. “It is over with.” I was just about to turn and leave, when she added, “I’ll be sure to come by soon and check you’ve no further violations.”
That made me pause in my stride, and I turned back, distraught. “What? Don’t say that.” I looked her up and down. “My home is private property.”
“You’ve already proven you don’t adhere to rules.” She plucked the cheque back up. “You think this changes things? This is a temporary remedial until you commit another violation. I know exactly your type. Always causing a nuisance to those around you.” She dropped the cheque back down. “I’m sure this won’t be the last time I see you coming to me with a cheque.”
I blinked and couldn’t believe what I was hearing as she pretty much described herself without a hint of irony. Her ignorance was mind-blowing. “You know this wasn’t easy for me?” I said. “I really can’t afford that.” I nodded towards the cheque. “That’s going to make my life difficult for the next few weeks.”
“It would have been less difficult if you’d apologised.” She yawned and stretched out in the recliner. “I mean, if you’d apologised from the start, then maybe I would have waived the fine weeks ago. Instead, you came at me with attitude, and that only convinced me that fining you was the right course of action. We can’t have your disruptive sort running around and causing problems in our peaceful community.”
My first instinct was to march off, cursing to myself, however, I thought for a moment, while watching as she lay back casually and taunted me over my situation. “Would…would you still consider waiving the fine if I apologised?”
There was a slight smirk on her lips, as she leant over and picked up the cheque a third time. It looked so delicate between her manicured fingers. “You want me to rip this up, do you?”
“Yes,” I said eagerly. “Would you?”
She shrugged. “I’ll think about it, I suppose. Let’s see how good your apology is.”
I looked around nervously, worried that someone else might hear. “I’m sorry,” I muttered, beneath my breath.
“Is that it?” She was clearly unimpressed. “I’m certainly not ripping this up after a poor attempt at an apology like that.”
“I’m sorry,” I said a bit louder and with more conviction. “I’m sorry, Carol.”
“Sorry for what?” That little smirk appeared on her lips again, and it became evident that she was enjoying taunting me. Clearly, it had been a mistake to share with her the fragility of my financial situation. Still, the idea that I could get off the hook and avoid having to part with any money was worth the mild humiliation of apologising for something that I hadn’t really done. I knew saying sorry for having a BBQ was ridiculous, but it seemed I’d been backed into a corner and this awful Karen was able to exert more power than I realised. I’d figured she was a mild nuisance, a busy-body that loved sticking her nose in other peoples’ business, but it seemed like she actually had some pull in legal circles.
“I’m sorry for taking up your valuable time.” I felt like an idiot for saying it, but I just wanted this all over with. “I’m sorry for causing a public nuisance.”
Carol crossed her arms and looked all smug. For a moment, I thought that would have been enough, but then, she let out a small chuckle as if an idea had come to her. “Ma’am,” she said. “Try again.” She bit the corner of her mouth and smirked.
“What?”
“Don’t you know how to talk to your elders with respect, young lady?” She dipped her head and I could see her staring at me accusingly over the sunglasses. “You should be respectful and polite when apologising. I can hardly believe it’s genuine if you’re rude about it, can I?”
“Fine,” I said with a huff. “I’m sorry for taking up your valuable time,”–I averted my eyes with shame–“ma’am.”
She let that word hang in the air. “Don’t let it happen again.”
“Yes, ma’am,” I said with a gloomy, nod of my head, dropping my eyes and unable to look at her. “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”
“It better not,” she said. “Or you’ll be receiving a strongly worded letter in your mailbox.” She cleared her throat. “Along with a suitable fine to teach you a lesson. You know I have the authority to do that, right? If you break the terms of the Homeowner Association rules, then I have the right to issue out appropriate punitive measures.”
“I know that,” I said, before tutting beneath my breath. “I’ve learned my lesson.” When her face soured and I could see an eyebrow raised above her sunglasses, I cleared my throat and corrected myself. “I’ve learned my lesson, ma’am.” It felt so wrong to address her in that way, and I loathed having to do so, but I just wanted that fine out of the way and behind me.
“Good,” she said, before gesturing towards the door. “Now, be on your way.” Her eyes were at once hidden behind the shades, and her book was back up in her hands; my cheque slotted between the pages as a bookmark.
I hesitated, lingering, not sure if there was anything else I was supposed to do. She’d told me to leave, but still, she hadn’t ripped up the cheque. What was stopping her from cashing it anyway? I already knew I couldn’t trust her. “So…uh…is the cheque going to be ripped up, like you said?” When she didn’t answer, I added in a shaky voice, “Ma’am? Are you going to destroy the cheque, ma’am?”
Carol tutted out load, before she slapped the book closed. “You’re really not good at paying attention, are you? I said I’d consider ripping it up after you apologised. I am still considering it, and will do so for the remainder of the afternoon while I enjoy the sun. But to honest, with the way you’re annoying me, I’ve a good mind to go and cash it right now.”
I couldn’t bear the thought of wondering for the rest of the day whether Carol was going to cash the cheque or not. “Carol, please,” I said, in an almost begging manner. “I just bought this place. The mortgage is going to pound me every month. I can’t afford this on top of that.” I nodded towards the cheque in her hand. “That’s really going to set me back. I’ve learned my lesson, I swear. Can we just call it quits and I won’t cause you anymore problems?”
“You should have thought about that before erecting that ghastly eyesore for the rest of us to suffer its smoke.” She then removed her shades, and narrowed her eyes at me while looking down her upturned nose. “And it’s ma’am to you, young lady.” She shook her head and rolled her eyes. “You know what? I’m tired of your attitude. I’ll be cashing this cheque once I’ve finished this chapter.”
Such was the strict, forcefulness of her tone, that I almost shrank in my demeanour, my spine rattled. “Sorry, ma’am,” I said nervously, my throat feeling tight. “It’s just…if there’s anything I can do to convince you to let me off the fine, please, just tell me and I’ll do it.” I licked my lips. “I already apologise like you wanted, so you can see I’m willing to compromise.” The advice of my friend was fresh in my mind. Be reasonable, be amicable and come to a compromise.
Carol was silent for a moment, her arms crossed while she sat the picture of confidence. Her one foot was still dangling over the knee of the other, and casually swung from side to side. It was such a bizarre scene to be taking place, with myself being an easy twenty years younger than her, while she was the one barely dressed and laying around in the sun. She squinted her eyes in my direction, almost considering me. “What are you suggesting?” she finally asked.
I gulped, before shakily adding, “Well, someone told me that you let him off a fine because he changed the tyre on your car?” I didn’t have a clue how to change a tyre, but it seemed way more appealing to me than a $600 fine.
Will there a part 2?