She got up on one elbow, looking very sad. “Dennis, I don’t know if that’s a good idea. I get a feeling when we say goodbye next week, it’s going to be brutal for both of us. Do you really want to go through that again in 10 weeks, then again in January? Dammit, why did you have to bring this up now, Baby? It could have waited. We still have tomorrow and half of Wednesday to enjoy. Or now, try to enjoy.” She turned away from me and I could see her shoulders shaking as she sobbed.
Fuck, I should have left well enough alone for the time being. This was where my relative immaturity came shining through. A more experienced man would have known this wasn’t the time. I reached for her shoulder and squeezed it gently. “Honey, I’m so sorry. You’re right, this wasn’t the time. I guess I’m just a kid still in a lot of ways. It was pretty stupid of me to screw up our vacation like this. It was going so well…until now.”
Linda turned back to me, lying flat on her back, her breasts falling to either side of her chest, looking lovely. Not nearly as lovely as her big, brown, sad eyes. Eyes I made sad. I stroked her cheek and she touched mine. “You’re not a kid, not by any means, Dennis. In most ways, you’re way beyond your years. And you give me so much love. The best I’ve ever felt, except the love I get from Michael and Sandy. That’s different. In terms of romantic love, you’re the best I’ve ever felt from anyone. You have to be very mature to share that with someone. And the way you dealt with my films…also, the sign of a very mature person. But yeah, this wasn’t the right time to bring up what comes next. Let’s just forget it for now, ok? Think you can just hold me tonight?”
I slid down right into her arms, and we hugged and kissed each other for a few moments. “I’d love nothing more for the rest of tonight. We can cuddle, and kiss…and tickle” I said as I tickled her side, not hard and not aggressively, just enough to make her jump a little and jump she did.
Giggling, Linda said “Hey, no fair! You big gorilla, you! I’m going to beat you up!” She pushed me on my back (with very little resistance from me) and tickled me back. We were laughing and teasing each other, with a bunch of kisses added in for fun. Then we held each other as we shared some big, hot, tender kisses that made everything all right again. At least for the next week.
“I love you, Honey. More than I ever could have imagined when we started this.”
“I love you too, Baby. And I know what you mean. It’s been a wonderful experience. Let’s get some sleep. Tomorrow is another day.”
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The next day and a half were peaceful, relaxing and yet, at the same time, a little tense between me and Linda. When we got back, we’d have 8 days before I left for school, and I figured we’d see each other half those days. I needed time with my family, had to do some shopping (though I could do that with Linda), and some time for the friends I had mostly ditched all that summer. Chris and some other guys and girls, all just friends. But they were friends and, aside from Chris, I hadn’t seen most of them since July 4th. I really, deep down, would have preferred to spend every moment with Linda. But I had to think of the future, a future that probably would be without Linda. Just the thought of that was breaking my heart.
We enjoyed the beach, we enjoyed talking and cuddling, we made love as often as we could muster the energy. And that last night, we cooked together…naked. That was a lot of fun, as long as we didn’t fry anything. That might have been very painful.
That last night, we made love slow, took our time, and it lasted a long time, almost an hour and a half. She wore this white lace teddy that made me salivate when I saw her in it. We shared a very teasing 69, edging each other, not letting the other get anywhere near their orgasm. When we each finally did cum, me first that time, it was like a dam bursting…no, exploding. It was a powerful experience, for Linda as well. We understood why the French referred to it as “Le Petit Mort”, the Little Death.
Wednesday morning, our last half day, we made love again, swam one last time, then got our things together and left by 2 as promised so the owners could clean up for the next renters. We were very quiet on the ride home as we contemplated the end of a great vacation that was over too soon. And we also had to think about what came next.
I helped her into her apartment with her suitcase and we said a long goodbye. We stood there in her dining room by the front door, hugging without moving. We held that hug for a long time, maybe ten minutes, that passed by way too quickly. I then did kiss her, many, many kisses, and I whispered in her ear. “I guess we’ll see each other Friday? I need to spend some time with Tom and my parents tomorrow. Dad’s off this week and next. Your kids come home on Sunday, right?”
“Yes, Sunday evening” Linda said softly through a voice filled with tears. “You’d better be here Friday and Saturday. Tomorrow I’ll pay some bills, clean, go shopping…oh, dammit, Dennis! How am I going to get by without you?” She was crying now, and her tears were causing my own to flow. I held her as tight as I could without hurting her.
“Honey… please, not now. I’m leaving next Thursday. We’ll be together most of the weekend, all day Tuesday, even into Wednesday afternoon. Can we talk about this sometime around then? Maybe Tuesday. I just want to enjoy us as long as we can. OK? I’ll call you later, my darling. I love you so much. So much.”
“I love you too, Baby. We’ll wait. We’ll savor every minute we can in the meantime. Go, before I lock you in my bedroom for the next 2 years.”
“I can think of worse ways to spend those last 2 years of college.” She laughed through her tears and gave me a light spank before sending me on my way.
On the way to my home, I held it together. I didn’t want to cry while driving, where every passing driver could see me. I pulled up 20 minutes later, brought my own bags in the house, and was greeted by silence. My parents were both off work that week as well as the week that would follow, but they were all out, probably doing something with Tom. It wasn’t their fault I wasn’t included; I’d isolated myself from them for Linda. But I wished at least one of them was there at that moment, so I’d have someone to talk to. Well, it was 4PM; they’d be home probably in an hour.
I got my laundry started, grabbed a snack, a hot dog in the microwave, and I just turned on the TV and turned on an early news show. I had been a little out of touch the last 5 days and needed some info.
Sure enough, a quarter after 5. my family came home from spending the day at lunch and a movie. Tom was the first to welcome me, with a tight brotherly handshake, then my mom and dad. They all asked if we had a nice time, did I miss them (I did, even with little time to think about them), what we did etc. My parents, being parents, could see the pain on my face. Mom decided we should all sit down and talk before we went out for dinner as a family. Even Tom was in on the talk. It wasn’t like I’d discuss anything graphic with them. In any case, they all had a pretty good idea about those very personal things that Linda and I shared. Even Tom.
My dad, the expert questioner, started. “Dennis, please tell me you had a great time together. I hope so, that you didn’t go and end up miserable all weekend.”
“We did have fun. We were able to talk and swim, we cooked together and went shopping on Saturday when it was raining. We took long walks together. It was just about perfect.” And yet my eyes were red and running.
Mom, much gentler than she often could be, said “But now you’re sad. You know what’s coming in a week from tomorrow. Dennis, I’m so sorry. We all knew this was coming, but your father and I hoped, unreasonably I guess, that you’d both be spared this part, the pain of the separation. I know I can be hard on you sometimes, sweetie. But I would never want to see you hurt like this. And honestly, we think she’s a very lovely woman, someone we would be so happy about if you were closer together in age, and if you weren’t headed back to school. You do know you have to go back, don’t you?” She had a look on me, a look that was half wary and half worried.
“I know mom. We both do. We’ve been avoiding talking about it. But Tuesday, we have to. It will be our last full day together. I’ll be here Wednesday. I’ll also be with Linda over the weekend before her kids come home on Sunday evening.”
“As long as you both still know changing your plans for school is not in the cards. I’m glad you had this nice summer, but it’s almost over, Dennis. Time to face reality.”
“Dammit, Mom, I know! You think you have to talk to me like a child? I KNOW I have to go back! Don’t you realize this is killing me inside?” I got up and stormed up to my room, leaving my family shocked at the table. I never spoke like that to her before in my life, with anger and even a mild curse word. I laid on my bed and stewed with anger.
A couple of minutes later my Dad knocked on my door and entered my room before I answered. “Dennis, listen to me. I know you’re unhappy, dealing with something that is incredibly painful to accept. But you don’t talk to your mother that way, not ever! Not with that kind of disrespect in tone or words. So when we’re done talking here, you’re going to go down and apologize to her, and you’re going to mean it. I know she can be..overpowering at times. But she wants only the very best for you and Tom. And me.”
“I will, Dad. I really am sorry I lost it like that with her. But I wish she would back off sometimes. Especially now. This feels like it’s killing me inside, Dad. I may never see Linda again after Tuesday. Definitely not for a long time. And even if I do see her in a few months or whatever, I’ll probably lose her. I hope she can meet someone else. I don’t want her to be alone.” I was saying the noble things, but my eyes and body were betraying me. I was on the verge of a big cry and my Dad, my tough guy father who took no shit from anyone on the streets, sat next to me and let me cry on his shoulder like I hadn’t done since I was a child. He was all comfort and love and gentle and kind. Just what I needed. A man-to-man cry.