“COCK CAWWW! COCK CAWWWWW!”
“That’s not mockin’ no rooster Miss L’Amour. That sounds more like a crow.”
Young Broderick Neucomb joined Sadie at the rooftop window where she stood trying to discourage the daily alarm cock, the rooster Cogburn from his morning wail. Yes, you heard it right, Sadie laughed over the irony just as much, Rooster Cogburn and the Lady, all he needed was an eyepatch. Still naked Sadie closed down the window to at least tune out the feathered fiend. “I know that. I was jus’ makin’ Cogburn think he had competition was all. You headin’ home?”
“Yes’m! My baby brother Chester should be getting up by now. He’s going to have a fit if he finds me gone. If’n I’m fast I can duck into the barn to feed the critters and he won’t even know I was missin’.” Brody was putting his boots on standing up.
“I’ll walk ya down, I need to use the piss bucket anyways.” She opened the bedroom door, “Let’s leave the lovebird’s cock cawwin’ one last time before Curly needs to get back to Millie.” Edward was half asleep but heard her and did stir enough to look at Carlotta laying in his arms, her delightful fingernails playing amid his mass of chest hair.
“Yer not gonna get dressed?” Brody winced at Sadie in ready to head down the steps.
“Fine!” She steps back around him and goes to her large duffle bag and lifts her cowboy hat full of money, pouring it inside the bag. Placing her empty Stetson on her bed head, she returned to find Brody in awe. “Will you jus’ go before I do. I can’t hold my bladder much longer. Too much whiskey frisky.” She hurried him along to the bottom step, Brody following her into the back room to use the bucket. Watching her squat and urinate was intriguing to the learning lad.
“So, that’s where yer pee hole is. I always wondered. I never wanted to ask Uncle Brutus for fear he’d hit me upside the noggin.” Done tinkling Sadie patted her bikini area as if trying to dry herself before standing tall. “Sorry if I’m a mite flushed watchin’ ya.”
“So that’s how ya flush this toilet.” She smirked then picked the bucket up by the handle then paused, “You need to use the faciliTEASE before I mud up the back alley, Brodside?”
“No ma’am, I can whip it out on my way home. It’s over the hill where nobody can see me.”
“Unlock that back door then, and you can be on yer way.”
“I can go dump it if’n you don’t wanna be seen without no clothes.”
“Brody? I don’t care who sees me. They all think I’m one of two things… sexy as fuck, or crazy. Might as well prove I’m both.”
“I don’t think yer crazy. Miss L’Amore?” He unbolted the back door and opened it like a gentleman for her. “Do you really think I should try’n get to know Esther Crowley? I surely don’t want to offend her none, nor her pa and ma.”
“Be courteous and helpful Brody, jus’ don’t overdo it and look obvious. Offer her daddy some help and ask if he can teach you a trade. You can eyeball Esther but don’t let her parents know you wanna jump her petticoat function. Take that part nice an slow, you can wink and all to let her know yer interested, jus’ don’t walk right up and grab the poor girl.” Sadie took the back steps down and found the sewer trench Edward had dug out back in the alley. Many other businesses had similar holes, so this was really no big thing to anyone. Peering down the alley she spotted someone she hadn’t met yet. “Who’s that there?” She tipped her hat up and poured her bucket.
“Oh! That there’s Mrs. Loretta Carlyle. She and her husband Wilbur own the mercantile. She sure is eyeballin’ you fer bein’ nekkid.”
“No, she’s eyeballin’ you fer bein’ with me while nekkid.” She laughed, “You best get on before yer the latest rumor. We don’t want Esther and her folks gettin’ the wrong idea.”
“So not wrong Miss L’Amore. Can I come visit you again?”
“Better not Brody. I’ll likely be movin’ out of Edward’s now that he’s engaged. You might wanna keep that part to yerself until he talks to Millie and Alfred. Okay?”
“Yes’m! Thank you for a lovely time.”
“It was lovely. Now get on before I make you wear this bucket for a hat. Wedge it on yer head enough you can be a buckin’ bucket bronco.” Chuckling the boy took off into a sprint. Loretta Carlyle watched the young man turn out of the alley before taking a walk. Leaving the stores back porch she lifted her skirt off the sand and marched right up to Sadie. Cogburn up above her was looking down and being his annoying self.
“Miss L’Amour! Why are you outside without your clothing? That young man is at an impressionable age.”
“He snuck up on me when I was tippin’!” Luckily, Loretta had stepped out after the two of them were already talking, she hadn’t seen him come out of the barbershop. “I hear you own the mercantile. Loretta, right?”
“My husband does, and yes, Loretta Carlyle. I merely work there and order supplies. Can you… please cover yourself.”
“Surely!” Bucket in front of her pussy, hat and arm over her breasts. “Better?”
“Hardly! I had heard you were a handful.” Loretta actually grinned before a scowl. “Thank you for saving the Sheriff and apprehending those outlaws.”
“That’s my job. Well, the apprehendin’ part. I’m no doctor but I did what I had to. I wonder if Tom’s awake yet.” A shrug between them they heard screams of pleasure overpowering Cogburn’s morning revival.
“Oh, for goodness’ sake Cogburn.” Loretta looked up with distaste, “Go on back to your hens.” As if obedient the rooster ceased fire and turned to strut out over the rooftops.
“Ya made that look easy. He surely doesn’t listen to me.”
“It appears your horse does. That was some show watching him sit in the street while you gave him an ear full. It was almost as if he were as human as you and I.”
“We jus’ came to an understandin’ is all. Mister O’Malley was gonna shoot him if he didn’t straighten up. The big fella seemed to understand me.”
“I heard you broke him at the stables. You are a fascinating woman, Miss L’Amour.” Loretta wavered, “Might I ask, why on earth would you defile such beauty with all of those tattooed critters?”
“Aww! Thank ya Loretta. Yer a mite purdy yerself if ya don’t mind my sayin’.” Blush!
“If only my husband would say that more often. The tattoos?” She pointed at her.
“In my line of work, I need to put fear in the enemy. The Dillsby’s call me the Devil’s daughter cuz of my tattoos. That and purdy much everything I do.”
“You are a bounty hunter then.”
“Yep! Until I find me a better job. Millie and Alfred are gonna hire me at the saloon to throw out unruly types fer a spell, until I move on that is. I need to wait on Tom and Mister O’Malley to secure my reward money. Grennen says the Judge will have to offer his blessing because I’m a woman to get the money.”
“It is out of the ordinary.” The screams from above intensifying Loretta winced, “What is Mister Pike up to?”
“He’s got Carlotta up there. I bought her for him fer the night. Seein’ as he’s lettin’ me use his shop to catch some shut eye when I need it. I might be movin’ out though, any ideas where I might find me a roof besides the saloon.”
“There is a boarding house at the far end of town. Only two rooms but they are quaint. It belongs to Mister Ramirez. He used to be a Padre until God told him otherwise. He lives a quiet life here all alone.”
“First time I’ve ever heard of God sayin’ ya better try yer hand at somethin’ more fire and brimstone.”
“That is true. He is a very nice man, very handsome, but please do not tell Wilbur I… look.”
“Secrets safe with me Loretta and please call me Sadie.”
“Thank you, Sadie. If there is anything you might need from our store, please drop in.”
“I’ll do that. I best get Carlotta home before Millie charges me more.”
“Question? Were you like this… up there… with Mister Pike and Carlotta Dean?” Nude!
“Sure was! How ya think I pay my rent?” She winked. “I’m a gal with needs jus’ like, well, no offense… you.”
“Oh! I wish my needs…” A deafening sigh she finishes her thought, “… it has been quite some time.” Loretta sighed, “I will not concern you with my marital woes.”
“Naw! Hey! You ever need to talk, I’m around fer at least another three weeks. Feel free to chat my ear off.” She puts her hat back on exposing her breasts again. Loretta lowered her gaze to take them in visually, those hand tattoos over her tits flipping off any voyeur disturbed her.
“Your rather large breasts… hold up quite well.” Silly cone!
“God’s gift to gunfighters.” Sadie winked and waved goodbye, entering the barbershop and closing the door. Loretta peered around her vicinity for eyes then fanned her features with both hands.
“Goodness! I wonder if she might… no, I couldn’t possibly ask such a thing.” Loretta Carlyle went on back to her store. Finding her husband Wilbur adjusting things on the shelves. Dusting with a feather duster she walked right up to him and attempted a kiss. “Wilbur?”
“Yes, my angel?”
“Lock the front door and let’s…” She wiggled her eyebrows trying to entice her man, “… just this once.”
“I’m truly not in the mood Loretta. I drank too much at the saloon last night. I daresay I have a hangover.” She looked straight down at his britches with a frown.
“Certainly, no hangover that might include me.” Dick rising to say good morning was not for her. A moment of thought she sighed, “I just saw Miss L’Amour out in the alley as naked as the day she was born.”
“Oh?” His eyes sparkled and his crotch blossomed outward with might.
“Why can you never do that for me? Maybe I should step outside like Miss L’Amour and let the whole town see me. I bet one of them might find me attractive.” She turned away in a huff! It was an intriguing idea.
Heading back upstairs Sadie found Edward and Carlotta getting dressed. A silence in the room Sadie went to her bag near the window and plucked it up. Hauling it to the bed she brushed the covers out in an effort to somewhat make it look tidier. It reeked of sex and her nostrils being as sensitive as they were made her wince. “Woooweeeee! We need to launder these sheets, Eddie.”
“Perhaps you might find time to do that while I open my business?” Silence ended.
“Yu Rang runs a laundry out of Mistress Millie’s back room where the tubs are.” Carlotta joined in, feeling guilty knowing she was responsible for quite a lot of said odors, “I could… if ya pay for the services.”
“Yu Rang?” Sadie laughed, “That’s hilarious! I’m suspectin’ a Chinese fella?”
“A Chinese lady. Came to town by herself and stayed. She won’t be no dove though, so she just washes clothes.”
“I’ll have to say howdy to Miss Rang. Tell ole’ Alfred to run us a tab, I’ll settle that tonight or tomorrow. I need some clothing washed too but I’d rather do that myself. I don’t have much as it is.”
“I thought you were going to stop by the tailors and have some new clothing made.”
“I’ll have to do that in a day or three. I’m gonna go grab my new saddle if Dooley has it done and get Tarnation used to it. If he’s cooperative I’m gonna swipe Ned Potter from the jail and see if I can spook him into showin’ me where the towns money is hidden, O’Malley’s land deeds are in there too.”
Sadie put on her camisole, dirty and stained by sweat but cooler to wear seeing as the desert heat was already reaching into the high 80’s. Her leggings were lighter than her jeans too, so she opted to wear those again. “Hold yer noses. Man, these are rank.” Slipping them on she wished she had packed more clothing. Back on the Butte the assholes at Wyndham Dynamics gave her a whole wardrobe but she refused to wear any traditional era-based attire. No dresses for this gal!
“You may borrow one of my shirts, but again, I have only two more left.”
“I’m good Eddie but thanks for being thoughtful.”
“Sadie?” Tilly Ford, Sadie’s onboard A.I. whom was only a link to a real person spoke up in her thoughts. “You do realize that the nanites do keep your core body temperature cool during the day, and warm during the night, do you not?”
“So, that’s why I sometimes feel different. How’s come it don’t work every time?”
“You need to request it, Sadie. The nanites will respond as required.”
“Now ya tell me? I could have been glacier cool all this time?”
“I apologize Sadie, there is much you neglected to read back on the mesa in your time capsule.”
“I thought you was my owners manwell!” Manual!
“I will try to fill you in on other advantages, but when you return to the mesa you really should read more. I’m certain I might forget things.”
“Eddie? Can I trust you with my money here? Yer welcome to use some for breakfast. Make sure Carlotta and the gals eat, don’t let Millie be stingy.”
“Of course! I am ever your faithful friend Sadie.”
“Thanks Cockney! Carlotta? You can’t stop smilin’ can ya?”
“I am very happy. I never imagined anyone to want to marry me.”
“Well, you got yerself a good man Curley. I’m truly happy fer you two. Don’t you let Millie and Alfred talk you out of yer nuptials. Matter of fact, if you two get married while I’m in town I’ll be yer bridesmaid, unless ya want Vera or one of the other girls to do that.”
“What’s a bridesmaid? Does she get to move in with us and be our maid?”
“Boy you ask a lot of questions.” Sadie chuckled, “No! A bridesmaid just stands up there with you like moral support. the groomsman hands the ring to the groom.”
“So, I’m marrying the groomsman too? Is he handsome?”
“Curley, Curley, Curley! We’ll talk all about that when I get back to town.”
“This reminds me.” Edward falters a bit, “I do not have a wedding ring.” This made Carlotta pout as if he had changed his mind already.
“Relax! I think I can help ya.” She patted her belly button jewelry then removes it. “Here! Keep a hold of this, it’s a real diamond setting. Don’t you lose that now, I can’t help if you do. I’ll get the blacksmith to forge a small band for her finger and put that gemstone into it.”
“Sadie?” Tilly cleared her throat, “Please stop deviating the timeline.”
“Shush it Tilly. I’m doing what I want. That there twinkly diamond existed in this timeline somewhere in the ground so that can’t be too harmful. Besides, it’s likely gonna get buried with her someday. Back in the ground.”
“Perhaps! Fine, I’ll stay out of it.”
“Good call Ford Farlane.” Tilly’s last name was Ford. “Yer drivin’ me on the wrong side of the road.” Crazy Lane!
“Fairlane? Oh, I get it. Forget I brought it up.”
Holster applied to her hips and her Glock installed rather than her Colt Edward eyed the strange looking pistol. “Don’t ask! I had it made special for me.”
“Ah! As long as it shoots.”
“Better than my Colt here. Y’know what? I’m gonna leave this for you. My gut says you don’t even own a gun, do ya?”
“I did! Until I nearly shot my foot off.”
“Yeah?” She retrieves the Colt and unloads it. “Paperweight it is.” Carlotta giggled over it. “You best walk yer bride on home and grab a bite before you open up for scalpin’.”
“Yes! I will have a customer within the hour.” Fingers crossed! Money was getting tight. “Come beloved.”
“She did that all night. Hell, Loretta Carlyle heard you two.”
“Oh Lord! I will never… NO! I will not live for others. Well, just for Carlotta here.”
“He’s a keeper!” Boots and hat on, Sadie took just enough money of Red Butler’s stash to buy a few snacks for the road. Hopefully the mercantile had potato chips. Probably not, but she was craving a Lays. Stripping the bed Sadie and Carlotta took the sheets and blanket downstairs. Out the front door into the morning sunlight they went. After locking up Sadie handed Edward the sheets.
“Fill yer bellies. I’ll be back as soon as I can. Oh, and Eddie? I think I’m gonna bunk at the Padres boarding house up the street. Loretta let me in on that. I think I have enough money for a spell now. ‘Tween what I got upstairs and whatever Millie pays me for bouncin’.” A hop in step her breasts were playing hot poTATA! Her words!
“I thought you intended to leave tomorrow. Will you be back before leaving town?”
“Changed my mind! Doubt it! You two just keep on making goo goo eyes at one another. Take things slow around Millie until I get home to back you two up, in case she doesn’t want to give Carlotta up easily.”
“She will not be happy.”
“Momma birds usually boot the babies out of their nest sooner or later. I’ll deal with her. I’m off to see if Sheriff Barrett or Grennen is awake so I can borrow Ned Potter later. See y’all soon.” Boots clicking on the walkway Sadie left the lovebirds behind. They were so cute together.
“Knock! Knock!”
Sadie Lynn Outlaw had taken the stairs up to Doctor Mayfair Hollister’s office and infirmary. Looking through the door she saw Deputy Ira Grennen still on the operating table but covered up. “No way is Ira sucking his thumb.” She had to grin at Grennen. Stepping from his bedroom the good Doctor was still in his sleeping gown. Seeing her in the window of his door he paused her to allow him to go put on some trousers and an unbuttoned dress shirt over a thin under tank. Eyeglasses on as well, he unlocked his door to let her in.
“Mornin’ Doc! How’s our patients?”
“Ira will be fine. Tom will need a few days off of his feet I’m afraid, but he is resting nicely.”
“Good to hear. Need me to carry Grennon on home?”
“I intended to enquire if Brutus might.”
“Deputy Kinkaid is prolly sleeping in the jail by now. Long night!”
“I can hear you two babblin’.” Ira spoke without looking, wiping his wet thumb on his sheet. “Just help me down the stairs and to the jail, I can let Brutus go on home for a rest.”
“Are you sure yer up to it Ira?” Sadie approached him and saw morning wood tenting his sheet. “Yup! He’s up!” Doc hid his smirk from Ira but stepped over to his other side.
“Let me change his bandages and see how things look first. If I release you Ira, I do not want you to over tax yourself. That stitching might pop and bleeding increase.”
“I’ll be fine. So, Tom’s doing good?”
“Breathing normally. Pulse adequate. He however needs to stay in bed another few days. A chest wound is nothing to sneeze at even if he was lucky enough not to hit anything vital. Again, Miss L’Amour, our thanks.”
“Yeah! We owe ya Miss L’Amour.” Ira concurred. “I see yer still breakin’ the law wearin’ that get up.”
“Get over it, Ira. Ain’t no one complainin’ but you. Hell, Loretta Carlyle saw me butt nekkid in the alley lil’ earlier and she coped better’n you do.”
“Why was you butt nekkid in, I don’t wanna know.”
“Piss bucket! Had to empty it. Can I wake Tom for maybe five minutes Doc? I need his permission on somethin’.”
“Make it short.”
“He decent?”
“Covered up. Actually, Miss L’Amour, might you consider bathing Tom? He really should be more sanitary after his long trip to El Paso and what got him here. If I had thought about it yesterday, I would have had Clara Beth Jenkins, do it.”
“You afraid to touch another fella, Doc?”
“I really should hire a nurse.”
“Carlotta Dean. Trust me on that Doc. She knows how to handle a fella.”
“Millie would have a fit.” Ira sat up slowly as Mayfair uncovered his leg and carefully removed the bandages. The wound was clotted up, but small specks of blood still oozed. Sadie patted Ira on the shoulder then walked into the adjoining bedroom. Hearing Ira fuss like a baby she laughed and shut the door behind her. Seeing Tom with only a sheet over him as well, she squinted and tilted her head like a dog inspecting his own morning wood.
“Bet he pissed all over himself, that’s why the Doc wanted me to clean him up.” Spotting a large bowl with a water pitcher beside it, washcloth and bar soap handy, she opted to get the job done. With Tom groggy she got her fingertips wet and flicked droplets at him. A few times doing it annoyed Tom enough to open his eyes. “Mornin’ Tomcat! Nurse L’Amour at yer service. I’m gonna bathe ya so don’t get no ideas. I’ll try’n be gentle.” Wet rag in hand she dabbed his face and neckline first to cool him and hopefully revive him enough to talk. Taking her time, she applied soap and cleaned around his wound then the armpits. Going lower over his hairy chest to his abdomen he tensed up and paused her before she lifted the sheet. “Ain’t nothin’ I ain’t seen before Tom so you jus’ stop with the hide and pride.” Giving in she lifted the sheet and chuckled. “I take that back.” She stared at it with a pucker, “I think yer bigger than Tarnation.”
“Where’s Hollister?”
“Cleanin’ up Ira so he can get back on his feet. Did the doc tell you he removed a bullet from Ira’s leg?”
“I’ve been out all night. Prisoners still locked up?”
“Elbows in each other’s ear wax but yep. Deputy Brutus is watchin’ ’em.”
“Deputy?”
“You did mention that to him. He jus’ took charge with you guys down for the count. I have his back too. So, you jus’ heal up. I’m fixin’ to head out to where I captured the Dillsby’s and see if I can find the bank money they robbed. Cyrus O’Malley gave me a horse for going about that. Tarnation I call him, that’s why I chuckled over that hobby horse ‘tween yer legs. I think you peed all over yerself so let me clean ya up while I’m modest. You can get hard if ya want I’m not offended.”
“As if I have the strength to do that.” He mumbled.
“Now Tom, yer eyeballin’ my chest so, you can’t tell me you ain’t thinkin’ with Clydesdale there. It’s natural to lust over a hot nurse.” She bathed his inner thighs and scrotum, touching him just enough not to look as if trying to arouse him.
“Yer indecent.”
“That I am. And don’t you try’n get after me when I done saved yer life. I’ll be out of yer hair after I get my reward money and help the town back to the way it was. O’Malley said he’d talk to the Judge about my eligibility for the reward on the Dillsby’s. Can I trust ole’ Cyrus?”
“Doubtful! Never know with him. You come through with the bank roll maybe.”
“How’s come the town don’t have a mayor?”
“He is the mayor, it’s his town.”
“Ah! Yeah, I think I did get that impression.” She freshened the washcloth then gripped his cock’s girth and gently stroked him with its coolness. “There’s a twitch, I saw it.” She laughed. “You thinkin’ about me or Clara Beth?”
“Both.” He had to laugh finally. “You can take yer time.”
“On one condition. I need yer permission to borrow the Dillsby’s weak link Ned Potter. I figure all I need is one member of the gang to lead me to that loot and he fears me more than the others do. I’ll bring him back. I just need a lil’ help.”
“Do it! Careful of Comanches. They’re hidin’ everywhere.”
“I know how to deal with Comanches, Tom. Speak their lingo fluent even.”
“No shit! Where did you learn to talk Comanche?”
“Raised with some. My buddy Tickle Bear and his gramps. Long story!” She found herself missing Boone back in 2022. Tilly advised her to stop talking. “There! Least yer cleaner than you was. Want me to keep on strokin’ ya?”
“Tempted! Naa! Yer no dove L’Amour… and I am the law. Reckon I should behave.”
“Savin’ it for Clara Beth?”
“Why you say that?”
“Heard she was yer wife’s sister. I’m truly sorry to hear about her passing. Your son Willy looks like a scrapper.”
“We wrestle.” He chuckled then coughed. “You gonna stop knucklin’ my…”
“Sorry!” She released him, finding herself amused by his reaction. “Reckon we don’t need yer pulse racin’ too hard jus’ yet no ways.” A pat to his crown she covered him back up and tossed the washcloth into the bowl. “Alright! I’m gonna haul Ira back to the jail and relieve Brutus. Long as yer good I’ll nab Potter after I get my saddle and horse from the stable, borrow one of the other horses for Ned. I’ll keep his hands bound tight. Wanna tell Ira in case he doesn’t believe me?”
“Open the door.”
Getting up Sadie turned the knob and motioned the Sheriff to have his say. “IRA? LET L’AMOUR BORROW NED POTTER FOR THE DAY. SHE’S GONNA GO LOOKIN’ FOR THE BANK MONEY.”
“If ya say so Tom.” Bandaged and pants on with Hollister’s help the deputy was on one foot, babying the other to avoid pain. A tip of the hat Sadie winked at Tom.
“Wish me luck.”
“Yup! Careful out there.”
“You can tell that to anyone who gets in my way. Devils’ daughter, remember?”
“Nice tail!”
“Aww! Yer gonna be up on yer feet in no time.” She shook her ass at him, then mooned him on a final note. He did smile. “See ya soon Tomcat.”
“L’Amour!”
“You ready Hopalong Chastity?” Grennen just shook his head affirmatively and expected to walk along beside her limping. Caught off guard she picked him up as if he weighed nothing and put him over her shoulder. “Don’t go kneein’ my knockers.” Doc Hollister got the door and watched her carry Ira down the steps. Grennen’s eyes like saucers shrugged up at the Doc, neither man knew what to make of it. Carrying him clear across the street to the jail she kicked at the door waking Brutus up. The weary prisoners seeing her tried to back away from the bars crushing one another as if escaping judgment day. Brutus jumping up unlocked the door and let them in. Delicately sitting Ira at the desk then laying a rifle in front of him Sadie sighed wondering if this was a mistake in his condition. “There’s yer crutch. Are you sure yer gonna be okay Ira?”
“I’m rested. Thanks for… where do you get that kind of strength?”
“Flintstone vitamins.”
“Where’s Flintstone?”
“Next door to Tombstone.”
“They make those there?” Vitamins that is.
“Sure do! Go on home Brute. Brody’s back at the farm waitin’ on ya. Mind helpin’ Ira here one more night? I’ll see if’n I can talk Dooley into sharin’ yer assist.”
“Yeah, I can do that.” Brutus removed the tin star and handed it to Ira. “Fun while it lasted.”
“I need to take a shit.” Sonny Dillsby had been holding it all night, unable to reach the piss bucket. Sadie peering at the cell took the key from the desk and marched over to unlock the door. Ira drew the rifle closer just in case.
“Feel free to rush me. I dare ya!” None of the prisoners wanted pummeled. Stepping into the cell she snatched up Ned Potter who started screamin’ like a baby begging not to be punched again. His swollen nose still hadn’t gone down. “I figure you fellas need to stretch yer legs some. Ned, yer up first.”
“Can I take a shit?” Sonny cringed holding his abdomen.
“Sure!” She tossed Ned out stumbling then grabbed Sonny by his shirt and lifted him off of his feet. The fear factor made him crap his pants. “You done?”
“Yeeessss!” Sonny was lowered but held the back of his britches. Nodding with a glare she backed out of the cell and locked it back up. Both Ira and Brutus were stunned by her ability to terrify such rough looking men. Waving her hand over her nostrils at the odor of released bowels she backed off.
“Use Redmont’s shirt to wipe yer ass Sonshine!” Sonny wept! Now he had to dig out his drawers in front of everyone. “Let’s walk Potter.”
“Can’t I stay locked up?” She drug him out of the jail by the cuff of his neck and down the street. Her plan to come back after him altered, she took him with her to the stables, kicking and screaming. Passing by the mercantile Loretta Carlyle saw how roughly she was treating Ned and gasped. It wasn’t until Loretta heard Wilbur mutter, “Magnificent!” as he drooled over Sadie in passing that she swatted his belly and told him to get back to work. Back at the jail Sam Dillsby found his palms sweaty.
“What’s Mae West up to?”
No good!
“Where are we goin’ Mae West?”
“Maebe West! It’s such a purdy day I thought we might take a ride you and me.”
“Ride where? I thought I was facin’ the judge.”
“Oh, I’m the judge, Ned! Keep on walkin’.” Across town he shuffled behind her, glad that his hands were left untied, yet fearing her so much that bolting away was not even an option. Reaching the stables Sadie entered to find Shaunesy Finn helping his brother Dooley fine tune Sadie’s new saddle on an ornate level. Sneaking up on their fine leather ship talents they were branding the saddle with a hot poker bent into the shape of a female devil, big breasts and all. As they say, Devil in the details. A perfect brand Dooley cooled the iron in a water bucket and took pride in his work.
“Mornin’ my Finn feathered friends.”
“Feathered Lassie?” Shaunesy squinted as he looked back to see her, Potter in toe nervously peering around with tears in his eyes. “Ye here to tickle me fancy?”
“Sure!” She reached out and grabbed Shaun and Dooley’s crotches. “That there my birthday present? The saddle, not these saddle horns.”
“Aye!” Dooley grinned, “‘Tis a work of art.”
“My ass? Hell, yes, it is.” She spanked herself just as Dorieann showed up and swatted Sadie’s other cheek.
“Ye finally lose yer voice? We heard ye howlin’ way out here last night.”
“Mornin’ to you too Hunky.” Sadie in turn slapped Dorie’s ass. Ned seeing Dorie for the very first time straightened up and smiled with gnarly teeth.
“Howdy Ma’am! I’m Ned. It is a pleasure to make yer acquaintance.”
“Don’t make me pucker yer lip the easy way.” Dorie raised her fist. “Mind yer beeswax!”
“At ease Derby O’Gill!” Disney childhood! “Ned here is gonna lead me to that bank money.”
“No, I ain’t! I don’t know where the Dillsby’s stashed it.”
“You better or yer gonna be walkin’ funny fer a good long time.” Sadie sneered then ignored Ned to check out her saddle. “Awww! You branded me as the devil’s daughter. Yer such sweethearts! I love it! Jus’ call me Diva Diablo.” She shook her tits. Dorie wearing only her pull over shirt and boots, no under garment was hoping Sadie had noticed her trying to be more adventurous. Ned sure noticed, Dorie’s nipples were thick and meaty behind that tan-colored shirt. He was slobbering all over himself at her cuteness. He loved redheads with braided pigtails. Big green eyes only made him melt further.
“What’s in it fer me if’n I do? A kiss from Miss Hunky?”
“That’s it!” Dorie punched Ned in the jaw, and he dropped to the dirt smiling. No pain no gain! Not even his already broken nose was hurting at the moment.
“You have gotta learn restraint Baby Balboa.” Sadie laughed. “Fella’s? Tie up ole’ Ned there’s hands and bring up one of the Dillsby horses.”
“Can I ride out with ya Sadie?” Dorie looked hopeful, “I rolled some cigars for us.”
“Oh, well in that case. You boys mind if I steal yer sister?”
“Might do the lass good to get some air.” Dooley nodded his approval.
“Another thing. I know you boys have responsibilities, but Sheriff Barrett needs you boys to help Ira keep watch on the prisoners. I worry Ira might black out from his wound and those fellas might try’n escape.”
“I’ll do it.” Dooley appointed himself, “One of us needs to be here.” Shaunesy agreed and handed Dorie his box of matches for the ride. “Bring up Inferno! Ah! Forgive me lass, Tarnation.” Name change dilemma!
“I got him. You go put some britches on Hunky.” Sadie whistled loudly, a ruckus later Tarnation stood up in his shared stall with a filly he had hammered throughout the night and leaned over the rail to let himself out by nuzzling the gates latch. All eyes bulged at his easy escape. Trotting right up to Sadie the horse stepped over Ned in his momentary bliss and took a piss on him. Chuckling hard at his behavior Sadie bent over and dragged Ned free of his bath and allowed Shaunesy to go get rope to tie him up.
“This demon from Hades is made fer ye lass.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t say that. He just owes me.” A pat on Tarnation’s forehead, the steed knocked her hat off. “Alright now! Enough of that Brand… of horseplay.” She almost called him Brandon. “You gonna let me saddle you up or are we gonna get into a fist fight? Me bein’ the only one with fists I’ll win, and you know it.” A stomp of his hoof made her jump back. “Oh, no, you didn’t!” Dorie busted a gut. Dooley grabbed the saddle and tossed it over Tarnation’s back. Preparing to harness it under his belly, the horse reared up and the saddle slid down to the ground.
“Best let me do it Drooley.” Sadie plucked up the saddle and threw it back over Tarnation, calming him with a rendition of George Thorogood’s song One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer. Uncle Brandon loved the old school ballads of the 80’s. To everyone’s shock Sadie fastened the saddle perfectly without the horse objecting.
“Ye have the touch.” Dooley sighed.
“Let’s hope that touch ain’t too much.” She then recited the words to AC/DC’s tune Touch too Much. Another favorite of Brandon’s.
“I donae know those tunes.”
“Jus’ some fellas I met from Australia. Aussie Posse!”
“Ah!” She then rambled Men at Work’s song Down Under. Bewildered by the lyrics Dooley offered to help her up onto Tarnation’s back. He knew better as Tarnation turned and butted him aside. “I’ll be prayin’ for ye, Lassie L’Amour.”
“Thanks! What are you waitin’ for Hunky. Quit showin’ Ned yer legs and grab those britches. Grab a horse while yer at it.”
“Right!” Up to the loft first for pants, the girl raced for her favorite steed Banshee. Five minutes later she rode up next to Tarnation and sat ready to go. Tarnation was already flirting with this new filly.
“Will you stop sniffin’ already!” She patted the horse’s neckline. “Bring me Ned, Shaun.” Shaunesy led him up on a third horse. “Hole up! Better idea! Bring him down Shaun.” Grumbling over having just put Ned up there Shaunsey just pushed him off to land in a cloud of dust. Coughing Ned complained about brutality, having been punched, pissed on, then thrown off a horse into freefall. Dragging Potter to his feet Ned handed Sadie the other end of the lengthy rope.
“You ain’t gonna make me walk all that way are ya?”
“Take his boots Shaun.”
“WAIT! WHAT IS YA DOIN’?” Boots off Ned was a blubbering mess.
“Smells bad! Strip him, Shaun. Urine boy needs to dry off.”
“Ain’t strippin’ no other man, lass.” Shaunesy put his foot down.
“Yer up Hunky!”
“Say what? Me? Durn it!” Climbing down Dorieann pointed at Ned not to get frisky. Shirt removed then going for his pants Dorie faltered. “I ain’t… ” She wanted to admit to never seeing a man naked before but bit her tongue. As gross as Ned was, this was her chance at a look see. Dragging his drawers down she found his erection right in her face. Sucking up his tears Ned tried to step right into her and put his dick in her gaping mouth. Jerking to avoid that, his crown nearly blinded her. Clenching her teeth with a sneer Dorieann Finn drew back and punched him in the balls. To his knees he went. Face to face with her he hissed.
“Yer so purdy.”
Thud!
“Straddle up Hunky Dorie.”
Chuckling over it Dorieann climbed back up on Banshee and grinned at Sadie.
“He thinks I’m purdy.” Smug!
“Uh huh!”
Setting Tarnation into motion humming REO Speedwagon’s Riding the Storm Out, Sadie just knew she would be singing the entire trip. At least Tilly offered song suggestions that she recalled Brandon playing while they dated.
At the end of the barn, she stopped long enough to give Ned a chance to get on his feet without dragging him. Sympathy setting in she called back to Shaunesy. “Bring him his boots.” Disgusted the Irishman helped Ned put his boots back on. “Keep up Potter.”
“That’s a lot of miles.”
“Smiles too! You get to look at Dorie’s ass all the way.” Heels to Tarnation’s ribs the horse proceeded on. Dorie blushed but found herself looking back at Ned every fifty feet or so to see if he was indeed looking. His smile was from ear to ear. Dick hard she flaired her eyes. It did remind her of something.
“Cigar?”
“Fire it up.”
If there were Comanche nearby, the smoke signals were certainly clear.